...From Under the Toybox

Birthday Boy

2010-04-11T09:44:00.000-05:00

Cayden turned 8 this year. It's incredible how time flies. We are so proud of our boy. He's been making all "E's" in school. He's handsome, smart, and athletic! As we were getting ready to start another season of soccer, we realized that he's already been playing for 5 years. He's really very good, and we love to watch him play. It's amazing how quickly my son is growing, and I try to cherish each day. I love watching him play and hearing him say, "I love you" so many times each day, and knowing that he means it.

We had a birthday party on March 27th. A Mad Scientist party. It was Cayden's first real shindig in Cookeville, and we had around 20 kids. They built marshmallow towers, made slime, set off film canister rockets, and witnessed the power of a pack of mentos and a diet drink! It was such a great time, and I was so excited to give Cayden his own special day.

Winter 2010

2010-02-22T07:27:00.009-06:00

We've had a beautiful winter this year! My boys finally got to enjoy the snow! We had snow sledding, snow angels, snowball fights, and even snow cream! The boys had never been sledding before, and the neighbors were kind enough to invite them over to share sleds. Then, another sweet lady who lives across the street actually gave them 2 that she had in her basement. They sure had fun playing together!

That snow cream is good stuff! I made the cream mixture (with real cream!) and then let the boys gather the snow. It was quick and easy fun, and the boys loved eating it! We were all pleasantly surprised at just how tasty it was.

All in all, it's been a fun winter season with lots of snowy treats sprinkled throughout! We're looking forward to the coming of Spring and all the fun it'll bring.

Not For the Faint of Heart...

2010-02-13T11:19:00.001-06:00

I'm so sorry. This is a tacky, no-good, downright dirty story. I have to put it here, lest I forget. You see, someday, I'm gonna use this as ammo. It's going to be funny then.

Cayden: MOoooooM, Adrian is talking dirty.

Adrian: No I'n (never I'm, always I'N) not.

Cayden: Mom, Adrian said, "I got big balls. They JIGGLE when I go up the stairs."

Oh dear. He's only SIX.

You were warned.

Chris and I, however, laughed until we cried. Then, after we laughed, we disciplined. Yes, in that order. Now you know what's wrong with our kids.

I say it's all part of raising 4 boys....

American Pie

2010-02-11T08:47:00.003-06:00

Anyone who knows me knows I love to cook (and eat, too!). I make homemade soups and stews, and consider a good loaf of artisan bread to be a fairly easy task. Yet, my kitchen held a secret.

I had this sorta...fear. It was quite silly, I admit. Yet, it was real! So, I had to cut corners. I cheated. It went the *store bought* way.

You see, I was horribly afraid of making a pie crust.

I could just see my HOURS of laboring in the kitchen over this pastry crust, only to end up with a big, tough, burnt clump of....not-so-flaky-pie crust. HOURS, people!

But then, one day I told my husband that I wanted to make a homemade apple pie. "Get to it then," he said.

...and so I told him my secret. He found it quite foolish, and together we went into the kitchen.We prepped the apples and made the sticky syrup for the filling, and then the moment of truth came.

I did it, people. I made a PIE CRUST! My Christopher cheered me on every step of the way. It was actually quite fun!

We ate the most wonderful pie that night! It was absolutely delicious, and quite pretty too. I only wish I hadn't sprinkled the cinnamon on top of the crust... it made it appear a bit darker than it really was. Here it is...so that I might come back and read, and remember, and smile!

Cassian Drake

2010-01-15T12:32:00.007-06:00

Our 4th son, born 12/29/09 at 7 lbs. 11 oz. A beautiful baby boy with nary a blemish! We can't even find a birthmark...

His brothers are in awe. Adrian was so overcome with emotion when we came home, he could only squeal about his new little brother's "cuteness." At one point, the two were snuggled together on the couch, and Adrian let us all know that even if Cassian threw up all over him...he'd still be very happy! What a great big brother he will be!

2009...Where Did it Go?

2010-01-08T13:03:00.003-06:00

Christopher and I were recently talking about how fast last year passed. I spent most of it pregnant with Cassian, but really time flew. It's hard to believe that my pregnancy is already over even as I hold my sweet boy in my arms. We spent a beautiful nine months together, he and I, and it was the most amazing pregnancy I had experienced.

As for 2009...

I didn't blog a single time. Every time I came to do so, I was overwhelmed with all the things I hadn't blogged, and the pictures I needed to upload from the camera. I was shamed over missed photo opportunities and undocumented memories. It seemed easier to just close the blog window and move on to more fun things, like Facebook!

One of my 2010 New Year's resolutions was to keep my blog current. I think it's amazing to be able to look back on our daily lives and relive the fun times and even the not so fun moments that present themselves every so often. Having this collective record also helps me to appreciate time even as it passes so quickly. I have also committed myself to taking more pictures, though I may not always post them. One. Step. at a time.

Just a few things about 2009...

We spent the first 5 months homeschooling the last semester of the 2008-2009 school year. Cayden was the first to come home and Jordan followed behind soon after. It was an AMAZING experience, and we had a GREAT time together. I was also working at the Y, and it was often hard to manage my time, but we endured and I think it was worth every minute. I miss it greatly, but we were blessed with some really incredible teachers this year at the boys' public schools.

The first days of May left us feeling overjoyed at the fact that we were expecting our 4th child! The boys were thrilled, and Adrian was especially excited as he had been asking for a baby for some time!

Morning Sickness followed for the next few months, but I was so excited about being pregnant that I didn't care. Chris took great care of me. Jordan played flag football at the Y over the summer and also went to his first overnight camp- Camp Woodmen. He loved it, and is counting days to go this year. Cayden is hoping he'll get to go, too, but the decision has yet to be made.

Adrian started Kindergarten this year. Cayden went to 2nd, and Jordan headed off to middle school in 5th grade. All are thriving. Cayden has all "E's" (A's) and ADORES his teacher. Jordan is one of the top readers in his school. He spent the last few months working his way through the Harry Potter series. I was so proud as his love for reading flourished. Both Jordan and Cayden have been getting some great drawing lessons from their very artistic dad. It's amazing to watch them improve under his instruction.

Christopher has been enrolled in school for the entire year of 2009, with a perfect GPA. He won a prestigious award at Oreck this year, and has been presented with some great opportunities for professional growth. All of this and somehow he still remains a loving, devoted, and simply AMAZING husband and father. We are so blessed.

I continue to work at the YMCA, though right now I am taking a break for baby. The past year was a year of great change at the Y, but we pressed on. I look forward to going back to work in a few weeks, and I think the boys miss being there, too.

Chris and I took a mini vacation together this year. We went to DragonCon back in September. Dad was kind enough to fly out and take care of the boys. It was great fun for everyone, and we enjoyed the opportunity to embrace our geeky side. :D 2009 was also the year that I finally ventured to play a few video games with him, and found myself having way too much fun! The boys love watching us play, too, so it makes for some amusing family times!

The boys played soccer in the spring and fall. Cayden and Adrian show amazing talent at the game. Jordan opted to sit out in the fall but will play again this spring. They all love playing sports at the Y. Jordan played basketball at the beginning of the year, and I think that is probably his favorite sports experience so far. I hope he'll get to play again in the future. We are sitting out this time since we just had the baby.

Other things to note:
MeMaw, Morgan, Dad, and Aunt Lou came in the Spring. So. Much. Fun.
Jordan won 1st place in 4-H speech contest.
Adrian and Dad built birdhouse together.
Went to Frist Art museum- so much fun!
Took a trip to MS over the summer.
Crawfish boil in TN with the C's. 100 lbs for 100 people! Doh.
DragonCon!
4th of July with the Kail family.
Halloween with the Kails.
Dad was with us for Christmas AND New Years!

....and I reserve the right to add to this list as needed.

So, there you go! Next post will have pictures... stay tuned.

Snow Day!

2008-12-01T18:43:00.003-06:00

Breakfast with Jenni @8:15. Or not. It turned out to be a snow day, and so Jenni and I canceled our breakfast, and I planned to stay home and bake cookies. I had to go to WalMart for a couple cookie things, though.

So, off to Wal-Mart the boys and I went, braving the "snow." It was like... 5 flakes at the time. Anyway, Jordan lamented that he missed his friend Robert, and Cayden was agreeing and wishing he could hang out with Laura. What a delightful surprise to see Jenni and the crew at Wal-Mart! Plans of baking were pushed aside, and we all joined up at her place. The boys got to hang with their much missed pals, while my friend and I found comfort in her kitchen making soup. Good soup. I'd never had it it, but Jenni was kind to send some home for my family's dinner, and we loved it!

Cheeseburger Soup. Much better than a real cheeseburger! Real comfort food.

Now, if I were a really good blogger, I would upload a picture of my kids and their friends. with their heads together in a real Rockwell moment and all that.

Alas, here's a stolen-off-the-internet picture of cheeseburger soup. Hope you don't mind the compromise.

So, tomorrow. There will be cookies. And maybe pictures of said cookies... or even kids who bake cookies! Tomorrow... or soon. Because tomorrow does not always mean tomorrow...

Where did the year go?

2008-11-30T07:54:00.002-06:00

It seems like almost yesterday that Chris' parents were here for Thanksgiving '07. I guess since I've been working and busy, that the time has flown by. I'm not sure if that's a good thing. Hopefully there will be more time to stop and enjoy the simple things this year. Smell the coffee! I've cut back my hours at work and my responsibilities. This is good, because I can be home again, and actually COOK for my family. I think we've had enough burgers and tacos to last us a long while.

Thanksgiving has come and gone, and now the focus is on the Christmas season. I asked the boys what they wanted, and they really couldn't come up with anything. Cayden asked for a guitar. So, this will be a small Christmas in terms of gifts, but we're making some fun plans to celebrate the season. We'll start Jotham's Journey today, too. I'm looking forward to enjoying it with all 3 boys. We've started making a list of Christmas cookies to bake as well. I think we'll send some to the grandparents and friends this year.

So, that's that for today. My coffee is waiting, and so is my book.

I'm reading Outlander: Fiery Cross. And while I think Jamie Fraser is an amazing man, I can surely say that I'm married to my very own J.F and he still makes me swoon.

I'm not playing catchup

2008-09-12T13:37:00.002-05:00

I keep looking at my blog. April 27th gets further and further away, and I keep thinking about how much I need to catch up on, but now it's just old news.

Life has been good. Summer was so busy and so much fun that I didn't have time to post!

I promise to return tomorrow, with pictures, and I'll start talking good things again....really!

Still Livin'

2008-04-27T22:41:00.002-05:00

Just a quick update. The boys are doing great! They're all playing soccer right now, and signed up to start baseball in a few weeks. Adrian scored his first soccer goal this year yesterday. Great job, Adrian! His victory dance was so cute, and so...uncontrollable. Loved the excitement glimmering in his eyes. Just had to put it here so we'd remember it. Jordan has been getting honor roll at school (YEAH!) and Cayden is practically reading already. He has the most beautiful penmanship I've ever seen.

I'm so proud of my boys. I love them. I love that everyone else likes them, too. People are always looking for them wherever we are. "Where's Jordan?" "Is Cayden in Childwatch?" It's so good to know that they have friends and are so well liked.

Chris and I are doing well. Finally adjusting to my nearly full-time job. I've managed to keep up the house, dinner, and work quite well lately. It's been good, really. I LOVE my job, and Chris loves his, too. He's going back to school in August, so that'll throw another wrench into our lives but nothing we can't handle.

Peace out. I'm tired.

Promotion!

2008-03-12T22:53:00.002-05:00

Me = (officially) Sports/Programs Coordinator for our local "Y". I'd been slowly assuming some of these duties for a couple of months now, but now it's really official. I'm so excited about strengthening our programs. So many details, but so much reward!

I'll never get rich working at the Y, but I love that I can still be a mom and put my family first. I love that my coworkers are united by our loyalty to Jesus Christ, and that we are starting a Christian Emphasis Committee to make sure that the "C" in YMCA continues to be our focus.

I love my job (CAREER!). I love the people. And the promotion is nice, too.
Today, Adrian helped me bag the soccer balls, and the boys got to be part of daycamp this week while I was was there working alongside them, learning the ins/outs of leading our daycamp program. It was a good feeling...

Life is good. God is awesome. Family is fabulous.

Thank you, Lord.

Presbyterianism... Is that even a word?

2008-03-09T20:26:00.002-05:00

Since we've been in Cookeville, we've tried numerous churches. Some non-denominational, some seeker-sensitive, and AOG. Today, we went to a Presbyterian church. Now, we've been invited to this church months ago, and we never made it out that way. It just wasn't... on the list. But then this happened, and THAT happened, and the minister stumbled over our path, and then this other thing happened... and so today, we went.

And...

It was good. Not that "rockin' celebration" good, but it was refreshing in it's simplicity. The people were very friendly, and I knew quite a few from the Y. Good people. And Caleb (the minister? pastor?) is a terrific speaker (maybe cause he went to LSU? Concidence #1) and he's Adrian's soccer coach this year, too (coincidence #2). We enjoyed his sermon. The service was only about 1 hour and 10 minutes, but it was a good use of time, and not too short. The boys got a little restless, but I think they could adjust.

So... yeah. We liked it. We're going to "Sunday School" next week. I haven't been to Sunday school since I was a kid. Fun.

A Soccer Mom...and Proud of It!

2008-03-09T15:22:00.002-05:00

A forum I frequent asked about being a soccer mom, and what it meant. Stereotypes abound, some positive and others not. It got me thinking, though..

Nothing like a little reflection on a Sunday afternoon.

A year ago, I cringed at the words "Soccer Mom." I homeschooled, and my kids did not play sports. Then they did, and I coached. Yet, I was *not* a soccer mom. I was a recluse.

Today, I most definitely am one.

In fact, I am *the* soccer mom. I co-coordinate our local YMCA soccer league. My kids are in a (fabulous) public school. I drive a small SUV. I work part-time at the Y as a wellness coach and sports coordinator, and we eat dinner together when we can. One of my boys played basketball, they are all in spring soccer, and 2 of them are playing baseball. We spend massive amounts of our time on the road between driving to school, going to church, and being at the YMCA. We live and dress comfortably (middle class). I never leave the house without my cell phone. My deep freezer which once held frozen HOMEMADE waffles, soups, breads, and wrapped meats and OAMC meals, is now filled to the brim with convenience foods.

What a change... But you know what? I'm happy. My kids are THRIVING. My husband is proud of us. We love each other. We're all living lives full of achievement and accomplishment.

I'm definitely a "soccer-mom" and proud of it.

Adrian Says...

2008-02-20T18:31:00.001-06:00

"Mom, Cayden made me stick me my hand down my pants, and now it STINKS."

Pass the handsoap, please...

PaPaw Ford

2008-02-18T08:57:00.003-06:00

I got a call last week, on Feb. 6, that Papaw was ready to pass. I made it on a plane, and joined my family at his bedside. From my perspective, papaw had already died when I arrived, but his breathing mechanisms hadn't completely shut down. He officially passed into the arms of Jesus at 4:30 am Feb. 7th. We surrounded his bedside, in prayer, as he took his final breaths. There were no formal services following. For me, it was a beautiful experience. But, then, I've been to some really rough "over-the-top" funerals over the years. I want my death to be honored much like we honored Papaw. Intimately, privately, and quickly.

Funny thing. I loved my papaw, but I can't say I was very close to him. We didn't live in the same state as he while I was growing up, and so I didn't spend much time with him. I did, however, love him. I never knew anyone to say anything cross about him. He was a hardworking, honorable man. A few days after he died and most of the family had gone, my dad and memaw and I went through his dresser. I searched the bottom of his drawers for any unique, personal glimpses into his life. We found drawings of inventions that he'd thought of, pictures from his time in the military (what a handsome man he was!), and a copy of his resume from years ago. His resume much resembled what my husband's might look like, were it updated.

About 15 years ago, Papaw wrote (or began writing) an autobiography. I read much of it then, but only what had been written up to that point. I look forward to it being found, as I would love to finish it. That was probably the closest I got to him. Reading his perfectly formed block letters, words that he put to his own life. His own perceptions about his life. I was so proud to read it, and I was the first... I think it surprised him that his young, teenage granddaughter would spend hours on the couch reading about his accounts of working the fields, sneaking into the military at 16, making memories with his wife and children. I soaked it up, though, and sure hope to read it again sometime.

The visit home during this time of Papaw's passing was such a blessing. Dad stayed the entire visit with me. I stayed at Aunt LouAnn's, and was utterly spoiled by the time I got home. Dad brought me coffee in bed each morning, took care of me when I was down with my back, bought me breakfast, and was just...there. For some this may not be a big deal, but at 31 years old... I still felt like a daddy's girl. I hadn't felt like that for awhile, and it was a hard thing to leave. I think losing papaw was hardest for me, because it made me realize how hard it will be when I lose my own dad. But, that's a different post altogether. Dad did say on the phone the other night just how important family was, and I think he hadn't realized that for many years. As much as I spent those days basking in his love, he was reveling under the watchful eye and gentle touch of his own mother and sister... Love all around....

You will be missed, Papaw, but you proudly left a strong legacy and a wonderful family. We love you.

So, you wanna know my secret now?

2008-01-27T09:38:00.000-06:00

My story

A Secret...

2008-01-26T16:35:00.000-06:00

I have one! I can't tell you or show you until tomorrow, but it's kinda cool.

Oh, and I lost FOUR lbs. this week. Ain't that awesome?

...and yes, Sunshyne really is my name. I've been asked that alot today....

...and yes, I am the girl in the .... oh wait....that's my secret... but I'll get asked that question a lot tomorrow, and probably a few days after too. "Are you that girl/lady in the ......?" Yep, that's me.

...I'll show you tomorrow.

...and I won't DRAG IT OUT FOR TWO WEEKS like some people I know. Heck no. Just having a secret is bad enough for me. I hate surprises. You hear me, ANGI?

Wise Lil' Man

2008-01-25T14:04:00.000-06:00

Adrian: Mom, God is a superhero.

...smart kid...

Procrastination

2008-01-21T09:45:00.000-06:00

You know how it goes. You get behind on something, and then you get overwhelmed so you put it off, and then you get MORE behind... and it never gets done. Kinda like my relationship used to be with my laundry.

Now, I have that same thing going with my blog. All sorts of stuff has been happening, but you don't know anything about it because everytime I see my blogpage I cringe and go hide in my cold-ass laundry room. I haven't updated since THANKSGIVING. Forgive me dear readers (all 4 of you!), for I have procrastinated far beyond a reasonable excuse.

Let me start by introducing you to our newest family member:

Basil Bailey!

The day after we brought him home. He was a rescue pup. Border Collie/Husky mix. Such a cute little thing...

Well, he *was * little. He's already taller than the Corgis, and still 110% puppy. What a handful! I can't wait to take him running with me.

By the way, we had a nice Christmas. We got a tree this year. It's the first one since the storm, and the boys LOVED decorating it. We made cookies this year, too (though not as many as last year). Here's a BELATED sampling of our Christmas season:

I know this picture is blurry and dark, but we were having too much fun to worry about the details! Chris would tickle me every time we tried to take the picture!

Cute kids, aren't they? Wait... is that a DOG in there?!?! MacKenzie was occasionally throwing her 2 cents in there, too... or something.

The boys had a great Christmas. The oldest 2 got skateboards. Here's Cayden modeling his gear:
Jordan got some cool stuff. I think the biggest smiles came with a game he wanted and some BOOKS!

Adrian got dump trucks, backhoes, tools, and all sorts of boy toys. Since his brothers woke him at the break of dawn on Christmas morning, he really just wanted to sleep. He took a break from the festivities, all wrapped up in his new cozy Cars blanket.

So, we had a nice Christmas, and the New Year has been good so far. A bit on the busy side. Cayden is playing basketball, and Chris and I are both working now. I love my job, and Chris is enjoying his. The boys are doing great in school. Jordan is showing amazing improvement as the year continues, and Cayden is beginning to read. Adrian will most likely start school next year, and I'm still trying to come to terms with that. :)

I've registered to run the Country Music 1/2 Marathon in April. The only problem is that I haven't been running nearly enough. Here's to a better week on that...

So there you have it. A mediocre recap. But, at least I'm caught up.

Family

2007-11-24T17:40:00.000-06:00

Christopher's parents came for Thanksgiving. We hadn't seen them in 3 years. Everyone was excited and nervous as we awaited their arrival. Would the kids like them? Would they give Grandma and Grandpa the love and respect that they deserved? Afterall, mom and dad always make the effort to be as attentive and considerate as they ever could from so far away. The boys love the packages and cards they send many times through the year. But, I wondered, would the 2 little guys really make the connection?

As we settled in for our first evening together, my fears were alleviated, and all was well and whole in the Morack house. Family together, reunited, happy... My boys and their grandparents. A rare sight.

For three days, the Morack boys basked in the love and attention that only grandparents can give. It was such a precious time.

We headed out for a bit of hiking yesterday. Daddy Morack and I decided to venture a little further down the cliff. Don't we look great? He's such a handsome guy!

Chris and mom are looking good, too! Chris is looking especially... sparkly, but don't tell him I said that.

Yesterday evening winded down, and three generations of Moracks descended upon our TV with XBOX 360 controllers in hand for some "Call of Duty 2." It was Grandpa's game. Yep, GRANDPA's game. You see, Grandpa was the only one to head out shopping on Black Friday, for his very own XBox 360. Like son... like Father. Gramps' words, not mine.

We love you, Mom and Dad. We miss you already, and you haven't even gotten home yet. Get a realtor. Quick. And come back. Family never felt so good.

36 Minutes of Bliss

2007-11-24T15:20:00.001-06:00

I hate this picture for soooo many reasons, but I'm posting it anyway. I was in a daze. Aside from looking for Chris, who suddenly appeared in front of me with a camera, I was still in awe that I crossed the finish line and I wasn't very tired. 3.1 miles. It was so much fun.

I had a good playlist going on my IPOD, too. Special thanks to Eminem for "Lose Yourself" and Kenny Loggins for "Footloose" AND "Danger Zone." Kisses to Black-eyed Peas for "Hey Mama." Vanilla Ice, you rocked with "Ice Ice Baby," and MC Hammer... you da man! Nothing like running in the drizzling cold with a few OLD friends.

It was such a great run. Absolutely exhilarating. 6 weeks ago, I couldn't run 60 seconds without thinking I was dying. I'm aiming for 4 miles by the end of the week. Got that half-marathon in April, and I'm psyched for it. Besides, I've GOT to get rid of THOSE thighs.

2007-11-12T14:31:00.000-06:00

I've "unofficially" got a job at the Y-M-C-A! Tomorrrow is my "formal" interview. I'm so excited. I've been hoping to work there, and finally put my application in today to work in the fitness center. Within the hour, I was in a meeting with my new boss (unofficially). It will be very part-time which is perfect for me, and Adrian can go to the onsite childcare.

New incentive to stay with the program, eh? Weight loss continues. I ran 3 miles on the treadmill this morning and some weights. It was good to be running again, as I spent most of last week feeling weak and a bit sick.

I'm looking forward to the interview tomorrow, and possibly having an official job. I think it's actually the first steps of a career move, as I'm really crazy about the place and everything that it encompasses.

3 Miles and Candy Free!

2007-11-05T09:03:00.000-06:00

I set out to the gym yesterday with intentions of following my training schedule for the 5K, and then hitting the weights. Along the way, I decided to check out the 5K running course. It was a cool day and the views were beautiful. Reds, yellows, and orange hues filled the skylines. Tennessee Autumn.

So, I got to the gym, parked, and started walking to warm up. I don't know what I was thinking, but when I broke into my run, I just kept going. I ran the whole 5K course. It was awesome. I was tired when it was over, but it only took about 37 minutes. Not an impressive time, by any means, but I've only been training for 3 weeks. Can't complain.

I stayed out of the candy too. Cottage cheese and peaches is my thang. Love it. Yum.

It's Monday. May this week be one of Faith, Family, and fitness!

Note to Self

2007-11-02T20:04:00.001-05:00

25 minutes. You rock. Run, baby, run. 5K in three weeks. 1/2 marathon in 6 months. You can so do this. Run because it feels good. Run because it gives you a rush. Run because it makes you strong.

Just do it (sorry Nike).

~You

Camping Pics aka Brownie Points from the In-Laws.

2007-10-22T08:53:00.000-05:00

The little guys LOVED cooking their food over the fire. They said it was the best food they ever had.

Blurry. I think the campfire smoke is to blame. I still love it, though. Aren't we adorable?

A month has passed...and I'm more VAIN than ever.

2007-10-22T08:40:00.000-05:00

Not a single recipe posted... What a letdown. I had ambition and plans to make things so pretty around here. I was going to write about my delicious banana bread, pumpkin muffins, and homemade waffles with cinnamon syrup.

But then, I got sidetracked. First of all... my husband is HOME. So, I don't need to go into the intimate details here, but uh... I've been busy. And we're having fun. He still loves me, and I think he's hot. It's so nice to have him here. He's so... SWEET. Just don't tell him I said that. And... he's wearing clean clothes today. Nice.

Not only did my husband come home, but I still try to spend a few hours a week at the Y. On top of that, I've started training for a 5K on Thanksgiving day. I ran for over a 1/2 mile yesterday, which was great considering that I couldn't run more than 30 seconds 3 weeks ago.
I attribute some of my success to the new running shoes I bought yesterday. Asics Gel 100's. Not too expensive but they sure did help ease the cramps I was getting after my run. If I could memorize my pilates floor routine without always looking at the book, I'd be thrilled.

I also spend massive amounts of time looking at myself in the mirror. I'm shrinking, and I look weird. I have sort of a square jaw, and my chin kinda juts out...cutely, of course. I even have COLLAR BONES.

Oh, and the boys just had 2 weeks of Fall Break. We went camping. It was fun. We also spent lots of time watching movies and playing video games. Constructive stuff. They played soccer on Saturday. Great games. They've all gotten really good, and they're learning tons. Even so, it was good to get back into the school routine today. Focus.

Having said all this, I feel I've justified why I haven't been cooking for the past month. Well, I have been cooking, but it's not those Autumn yummies I anticipated. I made a great dinner the other night with a few homemade chinese-y dishes. Yum. Tonight, it's Chili. *MY* chili... my recipe. Perfect.

How's that for vain? :)

I Must Really Be Home...

2007-09-16T11:11:00.000-05:00

Pre-Katrina, I had a pretty good thing going with frugality and smart-spending. We so rarely ate out, as the deep freeze was always full, and I was a pro at keeping the kitchen running efficiently.

Since then, we've become fast friends with fast food. I never seemed to get back into the swing of things after we got the last house. Maybe it was because I didn't like the kitchen? Or the fact the water pressure wasn't very good, and so the dishwasher didn't work all that well. I don't know, but I didn't cook all that much there. I missed it at times, but mostly I just felt guilty.

So, here we are...Fall is in the air. It got down to the 40's last night, and yesterday's high was 70. BeAuTiFul! But, I want to bake..and bake...and bake. Yet, I can't eat and eat and eat. I want to make soups and broths and beans and... I just want to spend some time in my kitchen. I LOVE this kitchen, btw. It's small. I call it "nooky" and no I don't want to have babies with it. I just like that it's a small little alcove in the main area of the house. Everything is easy to reach and has a nice place.

So, I'm going to buy a deep freezer this week. I'm excited. It's sort of like a rite of passage in making this place home. I'll start filling it up before Christopher gets here, and then life will just be that much better and that much more comfortable. He's so sick of eating out it's not even funny, and I would love to have lots of comfort food ready for him.

So, I'll be posting my recipes and whatnot, too. I'm happy to be getting back into my groove again. I'm going to really work on keeping my recipes healthy. I've dropped a pants size since I got here, and I don't plan to go up again. Chris loves eating healthy with me, so it should be a fun culinary adventure!

I think I'm going to call the orchard today and go pick some apples with the boys this week. I've never picked apples before. I'll probably have more fun than the boys!

Soccer Season Kick-Off

2007-09-08T16:02:00.000-05:00

The boys started soccer today at the Y. They had so much fun, and so did I. No coaching for me this season. I was still panting and busy running between three fields. Who the heck needs kickboxing? Just enroll three boys in soccer, and attempt to be at each of their fields during the quarters they get to play. I succeeded! And now, they're all sound asleep. A quiet lazy Saturday afternoon.

All that's missing is Dad. *sigh*

I was so glad he came home last weekend, but I miss him more now. Much more. It was easier before, somehow.

20 more days...

This Blog is my Blog...

2007-09-04T14:15:00.001-05:00

First of all, I didn't kick him out. My husband, that is. It's just that after a couple of ~~hot nights together~~ errr... I mean good entries , he showed up at my door with his suitcase, and started looking like he might redecorate!

And besides, ~~he's got a great body~~ he's witty, he's intelligent, he's got great taste, and he's creative as heck. My place is a little too meager and plain for his excellence!

So, the creation of BrainFlakes. I love that name! He's so smart!

Oh, on a better...much more satisfying (for me anyway) note, my amazingly creative guy came HOME this weekend.

He loved the ~~bedroom~~ house! I've been trying to decorate and get it looking a little homey in the past few weeks. Poor guy has only spent like 5 nights here, total. But, I've attempted to make each of them count. :)

It was hard to let him go. I really realized just how much I need him while he was here, and I think those 2 days went by way too fast. 24 more till he's back again, and for good this time!

I can't wait...

....and I'll bet he can't either...

This land is your land...

2007-08-30T07:47:00.000-05:00

This blog ain't my blog.

Apparently I am... being kicked off!

With stark, vengeful qualities my dear, dear wife is removing me from the ability to really publish anything on her blog. Sure I will still be here, but it's more like as a sort of 'here I am' quality instead of a 'let me write this' quality.

With most of the internet's powerful rage directed at me for my last huge update, I have nothing left to Google for a while as I pack my bags and move my distopian future elsewhere.

Elsewhere across the street, and, also using the same template because I am really lazy.

I have decided to open up:

http://brainflakes.blogspot.com

So you kind folks be sure to put lots and lots of links to me so I get lots and lots of people to vote on my polls, view things I see on youtube and go 'that sure is funny right there har har har!' and point out facts you already know.

With Brainflakes, I plan on rerevolutionizing the entire Internet housing problem! Bring the minority websites into the spectrum! Stop URL seggregation! Open a hand to my poor, hurting Yahoo neighbors.

All this and less, if ever, awaits you at the above listed URL.

I will certainly look forward to seeing the immense hit that my bandwidth takes when the ones and twos of you flood into there to vote on my polls.

Anyhow. I am signing off to sign on to my other wild blog. No doubt you will all keep up to date with my thoughts and imagery.

Who Are These People?!

2007-08-24T10:11:00.001-05:00

Since I've been contributing my near awe-inspiring wisdom and dynamic insight to this amazing blog I've noticed something.

Something that makes a person sit back, place their finger to their cheek and go 'hm'. Not a long drawn out 'hmmmmm', just one of those quick, half-second sounds that signify something is amiss in the world.

And indeed, on this blog, something is amiss!

If you look to the right of this, so long as it's on the front page, you'll notice that there are several columns. These columns are filled with links. Links that I not only don't know what they are really, but also things I have no idea what to expect when I click on them.

I say!

Links?! On my blogpage?! That I know nothing about?!

Why I never!

So I went ahead and visited some of these links. And I've given a small review of each item as I discover my own webpage. It's fun! It's exciting! I can barely contain myself!

The Well Drained Mind : :
Apparently this webpage is dedicated to people whom love coffee. Not only love coffee, but also can't drink it unless it's filled to the brim and chock full of cinnamon.

Further inspection revealed it to be some sort of place for homeschooling moms. Immediately, I felt like I was invading enemy territory. Not only am I not a mom, but I'm also not homeschooling.

It seems very uplifting and very personal.

I give it ** asterisks out of ***** asterisks.

Life is Like a Lunchbox : :
The sassy wife of a pastor made this page. And she is certifiably crazy. I... didn't want to look too much into the mind of a crazy person...

But what the hell! Let's do it anyway!

This site appears to be filled with more of that homeschooling rhetoric that is insightful, wise, and has links to win free stuff.

Free stuff gives extra asterisks!

I've also learned that Nan likes to take pictures of stuff! I love pictures!

I give it *** asterisks out of ***** asterisks.

Classless and Lovin' It
Another homeschooling mom who loves her family and the Lord. I'm starting to see a... what do you call those things that keep happening over and over again.

Oh! I know! A sudden realization!

I'm starting to suddenly realize that all of these webpages have something in common!

Pictures! And... selling me things!

This blog is like a journal, and I love journals, too.

I give it ** asterisks out of ***** asterisks.

I-Monk : :
I get a very 'I'm going to be sued by Apple Inc very shortly... lol!' aura from this webpage. I say aura because I know that auras have to do with stuff like magic, I think. And this webpage clearly is not about magic.

It is, in fact, about a man's walk through life whilst interacting with God. It's actually interesting and neat. And I don't think he tried to sell my anything.

I-Monk does not take photos, either. He writes words. With letters. He has many letters that combine to form many words on his webpage. I approve of these words.

I give it gggg g's out of ggggg g's.

The Foil Hat : :
It's another journal about a homeschooler! And in one entry she talks about her period! OMG!

Tomorrow I think I'll blog about an erection. It was so horrible!

I give it / slash out of ///// slashes.

Walk Slowly, Live Wildly : :
A website powered by photo manipuation and Photoshop. Well as long as it brings in the money, I approve!

I give it :):):):) mercenaries out of :):):):):) mercenaries.

Choice Central : :
This is a nice one! The author gave me her name! And like any dedicated fan, I Googled the everliving funk out of it until I found enough dirt to bury her at the 10-yard line of a football field beneath concrete.

She is on top of politics:
"Hispanics are taking away our jobs," said Angela Broussard, 38, a black playwright.

She likes lots and lots of milk:
Angela Broussard, director of the Lafayette Diocese Food and Nutrition Service, said Borden is the sole supplier of milk for their school system.

I don't know about you, Angela Broussard. You perhaps are just a little TOO WILD for my internet.

I give it ~~~ ACs out of ~~~~~ ACs.

Pioneer Woman : :

Pioneer Woman is going to need an entire blog about her. I can't squeeze in all the goodness into one single entry, so people will have to wait...

Coons!

2007-08-20T20:09:00.000-05:00

A couple of weeks ago, we had some surprise visitors. These three little guys were actually trying to get into our shed, but we lured them with some chopped ham, and got some really cute pictures!

They stuck around for awhile before bounding off into the darkness towards the hillside. Perhaps they were looking for mom, or just more nice people that would give them some ham.

Some Verbage to Jordan...

2007-08-15T21:27:00.000-05:00

In just a little while, it's going to be your birthday.

You're going to be around nine years old now.

Nine is a fine number, it's just one year away from having a double-digit number. Once you break those double numbers, it's pretty much rocky from there.

But for now, you're nine. Nine years.

Just imagine all of the things that took nine years to create.

Unfortunately I can't think of a single thing off the top of my head, but I'm sure there are a few great things out there that have taken nine years of manufacturing to be perfect.

Luckily for you, you already have that.

As a person, you're a wonderful boy. As a son, you're a gift to me. Logical, smart, witty, creative and well adjusted.

As I write this for you, knowing that the Internet will forever keep it in place for you to review later on down the road, unless www.blogger.com goes suddenly belly up... I wonder what all I can write here.

In much the same way that I impact your life, you impact mine as well. You forced me to grow up even more, and be a man that I only saw on television.

The smart, confident, bold, stable man. The man that even when kicked, somehow manages to stand up again. Not to fight, but rather, to shield and protect. Nurture and assist.

It's you and your needs that drive me forward. It's your smile that makes me walk into a downpour of rain and go to work. It's your wants that make me make a U-turn through four-lane traffic to go to McDonald's.

It's your future that makes me stop, rub my chin and glance to the sky and rethink a rash decision.

It's my love that makes me urge you into more things, new adventures, to not ever say no to something you want to try that's different. It's why I stood out in the rain (lots of rain these days) to watch you kick a soccer ball around. It's why I told you to never give up when you kept losing those games, too.

I know it might seem like it, but you're not the only one who's growing up. We both are. It's an adventure in life. Something where the next turn isn't necessarily a page you can skip ahead to to read to see what happens. We're getting bigger, and older, and smarter, and soon nine will be nineteen, and no doubt you'll be educating me in things.

I love you, I miss you.

And when I get there, even though I won't be there for more than a couple days, we'll still go to the toy store. I do it for that smile...

Not first but not last...

2007-08-12T14:57:00.000-05:00

I'm one of those people who never quite come in first, and never quite come in last.

What's that mean to somebody? In life, though? Sure, I get Publisher's Clearing House envelopes proclaiming that I've won trillions and trillions of dollars... only to open it and see that all I really won was using my own stamp to send in the chance to be a winner.

And like many people, I also need to go the extra mile to get that 'extra cent stamp' because hell, I never use stamps. It's the age of the internet! I don't even remember what stamp glue tastes like anymore, though I do recall it being sweet and tangy at one time. I think I should go pick up a pack of pepperminty postal stamps for all my postage needs.

As all zero of my readers whom keep up with my daily life and constant paparazzi attacks know, I'm currently living in Mississippi. Or as it is better known today: Above Ground 100% Humidy Pool & Sauna.

The simple act of going outside blasts you with air so hot that you might feel like you suddenly stepped out of the relative comfortable domain of your home, or in my case, company apartment, and into the part of hell where they put the naughty Eskimos. You know the sort. The ones who enjoy to beat on baby seals.

Like the baby seal who got away, they neither won nor really lost. Kind of like me. Isn't that cute how that ties the continuing story back together again? It's like a literary bridge. Though this bridge won't be in Minnesota. And again like the baby seal whom got away, I too am missing my family.

Though not because they've been transformed into amazingly useful bottles of expensive oil, but rather because they are all so very far away. Too far away, I'm afraid. A couple of states north of me, and many hundreds of miles.

While it is sad, it isn't all bad. This is a year of writing things off. Like the Dodge Stratus on the fence we lost in Katrina. We had to write that off. Also the house next to it. Another write off. The two cats whom escaped out a window and lived on in the woods around the house? Well... we didn't write them off... but the fish. And a few other things.

But like all good stories, the time is closing in for this to come to an end. With each passing day I get closer to tomorrow. I'm a time traveler, traveling through time one second per second in order to fully experience just how things went back in the future when I was now.

I miss my wife and my children. All of them. Though probably my darling wife the most. Because she is my number one fan. My superstar. My hero. The woman who makes me feel like a winner even when I placed somewhere in the ten-thousands range of people across the United States who are 'people with nothing special about them'.

Were I not obligated by contract with my time traveling company to not skip ahead so quickly through time, I would switch myself to being with her now. To feel her warmth again and kiss her soft lips. Erotically grabbing her leg and raising it along my hip. The grazing tips of my fingers lifting her hair to the side and slipping behind her adorably cute ear...

And of course from that point it only devolves into us playing a game of pachinko over a tall glass of something made with ice, strawberry and alcohol after which we watch a movie starring Kevin Costner as Kevin Costner and then going to bed.

To sleep.

Honestly.

...

I don't like the vibes that I'm getting from you, the good reader now. I feel as though you feel as though I'm not being fully honest with you. For shame. Shame on you and your dirty little mind. Gutter head. You make me want to clean my brain with a brillo pad and gargle acetone.

...

Maybe sometimes I do come in first. But it's only because I have an adoring wife who lets me.

So here is this, the post that lets me tell my wife that she makes me number one!

And naturally, that makes her number two.......

Wait a minute... let me rethink this......

First Day of School

2007-08-01T10:32:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the big day! The boys started school. Jordan went into 3rd grade and Cayden is in Kindergarten.

I was up at 5:30 (how in the HELL does one do this every day?!?) making breakfast, laying out clothes, and downing massive amounts of coffee. We headed out around 7:30, everyone excited and apprehensive.

I walked the boys to class, and at one point along the way I instinctively reached for Cayden's hand. It was like something on a really bad TV movie as he looked up at me and shoved his hands in his pockets.

I wanted to strangle that kid. I wanted to shake him and remind him that I gave BIRTH to him. I BREASTFED him. I CHANGED his POOPY DIAPERS. ME!!! He was selling out on me way too quickly. Instead, I smiled knowingly, and we walked into his class. Somehow, I managed to get a little hug before I left.

When Jordan and I reached his class, I knew I couldn't take rejection twice in one morning. I just held out my hand and he gave me a "five" before he turned into his class. Damn kids. Who said they get to grow up and get all independent anyway?

I made it all the way to the truck before the tears started to fall. I called my husband. All he could really do was offer feeble amounts of sympathy in response to my incoherent babble and sobs. Poor guy. What else was he supposed to do 600 miles away? Demand that I go get them and homeschool?!?

So, they survived, and even had fun. Lunch was great, they said.

As for me? I just wish school started at noon instead of 8. This 5:3O thing is going to kill me. I'm sure of it.

Aren't they handsome?

Sunny Days!

2007-08-01T09:55:00.000-05:00

At the beginning of summer, I coaxed my boys into the apartment pool.

"We'll DROWN," they whined. "We can't swim!"

I promised them that dad and I would show them how, and so the lessons began. Panic would set in from time to time as they attempted to swim the short distance across the pool, and they'd come up gasping like it was their last breath.

Here, in TN, we've been going to a much bigger swimming pool, with slides and diving boards. Jordan and Cayden both started off on a small diving board, wearing Adrian's life jacket because they just couldn't envision themselves swimming the whole 8 feet to the ladder after diving in that deep water. After a day, Jordan worked up the nerve to dive off the big board, still wearing that lifejacket.

Some kid took to picking on him about that jacket, and so ~~I beat the kid up~~ Jordan decided to try diving without it. Cayden followed suit, and the next thing you know...

OH MY WORD (as my dear mother-in-law would surely say)!

Can you see him?!? It's Cayden, just about to jump off that high board. My precious 5 yr. old middle child, fearless and confident.

He dived off that board at least 20 times, and I cringed and prayed every time!

Here's Jordan flying sailing through the air. Fortunately, most of his diving was feet first, so I did a lot less cringing.

I was busy taking pictures and video of the boys on this day, so I didn't do much relaxing, but we sure had fun!

Happy Times

2007-07-26T20:03:00.000-05:00

The boys got new bikes last weekend before dad left. Cayden started out with training wheels. One fell off and he kept going, so we took the other one off. Noone ever did teach him how to ride a bike, but he figured it out within *minutes* and has been having a blast. There is a hill as you drive up our street, so they love coasting down it right into the yard. Pretty scary how fast they get sometimes! Boys will be boys, they say. Wait until I post the pictures of them diving tomorrow!

Home Sweet Home

2007-07-19T19:18:00.000-05:00

We made it! We're finally in our new house up in TN. We love it. The weather is nice, the people are well... country-fred, homestyle nice. Today, a neighbor introduced himself with a bag of homegrown tomatoes in hand. Another neighbor came over and sprayed my cable box that was infested with wasps nests. The lady across the street stopped by, too, with a flyer for her church. She goes to the little white baptist church up the road. The other neighbor came by to tell me the dump was closed on Thursday and Sunday, but I forgot and went to the dump anyway. Go figure.

Anyway, it's a great place. The neighborhood, besides being friendly, is really beautiful! Our house is gorgeous. I can never decide if I should put something in the garage, or the shed...or the sunroom. So many choices! I feel like the queen of my own castle. :) Thanks, honey.

Oh, and I joined the "Y" today. To all you "gym-membership" folks...you can stop reading now. To those that haven't joined a gym, carry on...

Doesn't that sound a little SPOILED? *mimicks* "I'm dropping the kids off at school and going to the gym." I used to think those people were nuts and had way too much time on their hands. In my defense, I still have one at home ( and the "Y" has a kids' playroom). I promise not to act like a typical, uppity, soccer-mom (no, I did *NOT* sign all three boys up for fall soccer today). If I start to take a condescending tone, then please knock me back down a few notches.

So, yes, I'm happy. On top of the world happy. I have a great husband to thank for ~~spoiling~~ taking such good care of us.

Speaking of said husband... he's in Mississippi working. *sigh* I miss him, terribly. I hope he comes home to a thinner wife in a few weeks. Somehow, that'd just about sweeten the whole "Y" deal...right?

Gotta go. The boys need their bikes out the garage...

~Me, happily spoiled, loving TN, missin' my man...

Bliss or Bust

2007-06-16T11:33:00.000-05:00

It's been so much fun RELAXING this summer. Yesterday I was at the pool with the boys, and really just enjoying the heck out of myself. I called my dad just to tell somebody how damn happy I was.

The water was sparkling, the sky was blue, and I readjusted my chair as I chatted. I laid back, and the chair...

The chair... It FLIPPED! There I was, in all my glory, splayed out on a lawnchair with my head on the ground (in the flowerbed!) and my arse up in the air. Oh my... and my dad was dying on the phone as I relayed the details of my position. Not good.

I'm so glad that noone else was at the pool, and of course noone was looking down at me from their glass doors at the 900 apartments surrounding the pool. Noone was laughing. And if they were...

NOONE was laughing.

I'm still picking flowerbed mulch out of my hair...

Yesterday's Dinner

2007-06-07T14:59:00.000-05:00

Chicken Curry (recipe by Pam Anderson)

2 tablespoons curry powder
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 large onion, halved and thinly sliced
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 rotisserie chicken, skinned and boned, meat pulled into large chunks ( I browned 3 chicken breasts cut into bite sized pieces)
1 (13.5 ounce) can light coconut milk
1 (14.5 ounce) can diced tomatoes
1 (14.5 ounce) can chicken broth

DIRECTIONS

Mix spices in small bowl. Heat oil in a Dutch oven or small soup kettle over medium-high heat; add onion and saute until golden, 8 to 10 minutes.
Add garlic; saute until fragrant, about 30 seconds. Add spices; toast until fragrant, 30 seconds to 1 minute. Add chicken; stir until completely coated with spices. Add coconut milk, tomatoes and broth. Bring to a simmer; cook uncovered until flavors blend and stew is thick, about 20 minutes.
Remove from heat.
Serve over basmati rice.

Okay, so I made this yesterday. I served it with basmati rice, garlic bread, and a delicious salad. Pam recommends serving this with mango chutney, which I did not have. She also loves using cilantro but I am one of those people that hate everything to do with cilantro, and I think it tastes like soap.

The salad: fresh romaine, olive oil, sea salt, fresh cracked pepper, the juice of 1 and 1/2 tangerines, dried fruit, and roasted pine nuts. Garnished with sliced Driscoll strawberries.

It was sooooo good. I've never cooked Thai or Indian food, but this dish was incredible. Chris is loving all the fresh salads and new dishes we've been having lately.

I'm going to start taking more pictures...

~Me

I'm having fun just being a mom...

2007-06-05T15:22:00.000-05:00

So, I'm coming out of the closet, now. I did decide to put the boys in school next year. I know, I know. I changed my mind several times previously, but about a week and a half ago, I had a day that it just... became so clear to me what I wanted and needed to do. So, I sent the school books on to TN, and decided to take the summer off. Aside from reading "Bridge to Terabithia" we're doing nothing.

Yesterday, the boys started VBS. I've got the next 4 weeks planned with VBS activities. They're loving it so far. I love hearing about their morning, and then there's lunch and swimming. It's been WONDERFUL so far. I don't have SCHOOL hovering over my head. I'm just enjoying being "mom" and having fun with my boys.

I'm excited about them going to school. I was previously riddled with apprehension, no matter my decision. But, now... there's no looking back. I know I've made the right decision. I know they'll both do great in school, and I intend to be involved with their education every step of the way. I'll accept nothing but their best, and I'll give them the same.

I'm a little sad that our decision will cause Chris and I to be apart for a few months, but we both feel optimistic nonetheless.

In a year or so, the kids won't be the only students in the house. TTU is calling my name, and I intend to fulfill my dream of getting my degree. I'm going to get a degree in something PRODUCTIVE, rather than the history/english degree I once intended. I'm thinking math or some science...

So, there's my ramblings for the day.

Oh, and it was so sweet to hear the Father whisper my name this morning. I love those moments that His spirit flows over me, like water... quenching a thirst I didn't even realize I had. Thank you, my Lord for giving so generously....

Back Already...

2007-06-01T10:30:00.000-05:00

Don't I look good?!? I ask because I came surfin' in on my cool new HP laptop that Chris bought me yesterday. I was tickled as he picked it out and talked with the sales guy. I felt like his princess, and he was so intent on making sure I had *exactly* what I wanted.

So, moving on... I've been tagged! Angi apparently wants to know 8 MORE things about me (see below where I quickly threw out the first 8). I think I'll give it a little more thought this time.

8. I love to read. Right now, I'm reading Wicked. It's so good. I hope to be able to see the musical production someday.
7. Worthy of repeating, I still get major flutters from my husband. His touch is like fire on my skin. The last 2 years of our marriage have been especially blissful, and continues to get better. I'm so blessed!

6. I LOVE to cook. Lately, I have been devoting some time to this lost love of mine. No longer carby processed foods, but truly healthy cooking. My whole family has enjoyed the food I've prepared, and it's so good for them. I credit my accomplishments to Pam Anderson, author of "How to Cook Without a Book".

5. I am really NOT a people person. There was a time when I really truly loved unabashedly, but beyond my husband... I no longer feel capable or willing to love,trust, invest without reservation. A hard lesson learned, but valuable nonetheless. As time progresses, I find myself embracing solitude and the comfort it lends. People fall to the wayside, but to no fault of mine or theirs. Tis is the way that life leads, I suppose. As I feel more comfortable in this skin, I find it easier to accept people, because no longer is there any expectation. Just...acceptance. And I know that acceptance often can feel like love. So, then, all is not wasted.

4. Since I rambled so much in #5, let's just say... I absolutely adore my kids...and my dogs. Not just in a "they live here" sort of way. I really ENJOY them, especially my dogs.

3. I recently made a difficult decision. After changing my mind many times, I came to great peace with my decision, but I still haven't "come out" about it yet. It's my own little secret, but I know that my husband supports me, and we have chosen wisely.

2. I'm truly enjoying life right now. I woke up this past Saturday, and went into a fit of giggles. Why? Because, for once, I had *nothing* to concern myself with. Nothing was unresolved at that moment. Nothing was waiting to be done. Nothing. It was incredible. Of course, people started getting hungry shortly after, and my moment went *poof* as I started cooking breakfast. But, even still, life is good.

1. My faith in the redeeming love of Jesus has been pivotal to making me a better woman. Walking in His grace has allowed me to see myself for who I really am, and to become more like I should be. I am thankful for His comfort and leadership as he has guides me through the fire and refines my heart and soul.

So...there you have it.

Today is the day...

2007-05-25T07:58:00.000-05:00

I'm shutting down now. While I *will* have my computer, I won't be getting internet access for a while. I need a break. I've got to evaluate some things, and there's a list of books I'd like to read. A swimming pool to be utilized, and a rec center too.

I've lots of decisions to make. That whole "To homeschool or Not to Homeschool" war is still raging in my head, no matter how many times I've made up my mind one way or the other.

So, here's a good-bye to you. Could be for a week, could be 6 months...

Laterz,
Me

If I blog it, then it must be true...

2007-05-24T09:51:00.000-05:00

Recap:

Last September Christopher came home, having heard the rumors that Oreck was moving up to Cookeville. "Wanna move to TN, honey??" It was an attempt at humor, on his part. He was worried that his job was going to be lost, and we were going to be completely screwed. It was enough to make all future planning stop... everything that was certain...wasn't.

December came, and came with answers. We were offered the opportunity to go to TN. With nary a bit of hesitation, we started making plans. Well, tentative plans, because we weren't going to go to Cookeville until the last part of this year, and you know...anything could happen.

I managed to forget about Cookeville sometime in mid-January, determined to get in the groove of life and school. Chris came home one day in late February and announced that we were moving in July.... Preparations began, but they were slow. We'd put the house on the market at the end of May and be ready to move in July. We set up a meeting with the realtor, and all hell broke loose.

"We need to put your house on the market as soon as possible," she said, referring to the slow real-estate market.

Panic set in, and we got to work. We never stopped working....not for 8 weeks. Sometimes 18 hours a day, but rarely less than 14. It was gruesome, tiresome, and hellacious.

Mid-April came, and we were ready. The house went on the market. We just had to keep it clean, but otherwise we could relax and wait for things to happen. Right? Wrong. In less than 3 days, we had offers, showings, and the house was sold. Plans began for our home finding trip in TN. My mind was spinning. Somewhere in this chaos, Chris got his promotion, too.

Septic broke. Everything was on hold. Cost us way too much money. Everything back on track. Finally secure a home in TN...

NOW here I sit, my house half-packed up. We're moving to Biloxi for 6 months. BILOXI?!?! Yes. Chris has to stay here a bit longer than anticipated because of his promotion. So, Oreck put us up in a nice place in Biloxi. The kids and I will probably go to TN in October or so, though we'll have the house in mid-July. The apartment in Biloxi is on the beach (Yo! Hurricane!) and has a pool and gym, and is bigger than our first house, so it's definitely liveable. It's just...not what I expected. Oh, and 3 days ago we were informed that the moving company wouldn't pack. We had to pack. They brought boxes. They brought unwieldy boxes. Like 503 wardrobe boxes and 3 book boxes. Huh?

So...I've got boxes going to TN, boxes going to the apartment, and I'm stuck in some chaotic whirlwind in between.

Yay.

Reality has finally set in. If I blog it, it must be true. I'm going to get off my arse now, and finish packing... because the movers will be here tomorrow, and well... I'm just not ready. I'm still in denial....

8 Random Thoughts About Me

2007-05-22T13:06:00.000-05:00

Saw this on someone's blog the other day and thought it would be fun. If you are reading, consider yourself tagged and do the same thing!

8. I really love my dogs. They're like my kids.
7. I get tickled at the smell of blooming honeysuckle, and always notice it before anyone else in the family.
6. While I don't care much for being seaside, I love to be in the mountains or high upon a cliff, listening to the sounds of a waterfall nearby. TN is really going to be "home" for me.
5. I sometimes miss having close friends, but truly am a loner at heart.
4. My husband's touch *still* makes my heart jump and the butterflies flutter.
3. I like fairies. They're cute and different and mystical.
2. I don't like Tinkerbell.
1. I get giddy during Autumn. It's my favorite time of the year.

Oh! And a most random thought... The movers come in less than 3 days. I still haven't packed a box. There are reasons for this, but it's quite unnerving, isn't it?

Details!

2007-05-17T21:29:00.001-05:00

Well, we went to Cookeville on Saturday. By Sunday night, Christopher had picked out a house and made an acceptable offer. On Monday, there was the home inspection. We spent some nice time with the owners of the house. Really sweet people.

The house is really nice. It's a little bigger than our current house, and has 4 bedrooms and 2.5 bath. There is a sunroom, laundry room and a garage, all new to me! The house sits at the end of a cul-de-sac, which is great for the kids. I don't know how big the yard is, but it's small. I'm not too worried about the small yard, though I was put off a bit at first. Then we discovered that there is a beautiful lake just a couple minutes away with fishing piers and a boat launch. There are hiking trails and beautiful parks right outside the little subdivision that is to be "home." The views from the house are gorgeous. Big grassy hills in the front and back, and a couple Bradford Pear trees decorating the front yard. I can't wait to see what the fall brings! Pure beauty.

Our current house is 37 years old, but the new one is 8 years old. The home inspection only turned up a handful of really minor things like a missing shingle on the roof. We will be painting and putting hardwood floors down on main level of the house upon our arrival. The upstairs looks brand new, as it was rarely used.

We're really looking forward to the move. We can't close on our new house until July, but here's the kicker...

I have about 10 days to get out of *this* house... and I haven't packed a single box. Not one.

...and we don't know where we're going to stay for those transitional weeks, either.

How's THAT for details? :)

Our new house...

2007-05-17T08:26:00.000-05:00

Off to Cookeville

2007-05-12T06:19:00.000-05:00

Finally...issues have been resolved. 2 weeks before closing. Nothing like cutting it close, eh? We're going to find a new house. Be back in a few days...

Caught Without my Makeup!

2007-05-06T09:43:00.000-05:00

I went blog-hopping yesterday, and stopped by Nan's. She has this deal where if you link to her, she'll link to you. Isn't that nice? I had already linked to her when I found this, so don't accuse me of trying to "attract the press." So, anyway, she's put me in a slightly VISIBLE spot this week.

If you're here from Nan's, then I'm sorry. You've caught me without my makeup on. I've done nothing special to my blog lately. I've been busy with the house. The house that sold...before the septic tank went to ...crap...

So, I'm thinking of decorating this place. I've figured out how to make a banner and pretty font and stuff. I want a 3 column blog...but I don't know how to do that, yet.

Oh, and amazingly enough, my children ARE still being educated. Cayden, 5, started Singapore Primary 1a yesterday and did great! Jordan is moving into 3B, and we're going to start My Pals Science this week. I promise to finish Johnny Tremain sometime in the next 2 weeks. We started it months ago, and shelved it during renovations, but Jordan is really wanting us to read it again. Mea culpa. We're also doing well in grammar and spelling. I'm noticing improvement in Jordan's handwriting since I've started him with Classically Cursive. Cayden thanks me daily for doing school with him. Isn't that the sweetest thing? I love that the boys enjoy it so much. I'm still considering putting them in school in a couple of years, but we'll evaluate the situation year by year.

I Haven't Killed any Kittens Lately...

2007-05-04T13:59:00.000-05:00

But, you know, I'm really frustrated with our buyer's realtor. She's passive. She waits for people to call her, and she doesn't return voicemails to my realtor for hours and hours or even days. My realtor, on the other hand, is a GODSEND and she's so amazingly perfect it's not even funny. Every day that passes, my confidence in her soars. She's one of the best at what she does. Still, it's making this other realtor stick out like a sore thumb on some days.

We're still not sure what's going down with the house. We listed it, and then the septic system started getting all...crappy...on us.

So, now we wait. We wait for water tests, buyer approvals, blahblahblah. Meanwhile, we've got no house in CV, and I'm finding more gray hairs everyday.

My husband is still the best, and contributes to saving the kittens, and makes me happy, and provides hearty distraction from the grim realities of relocation woes.

Well, THIS Made Me Laugh...

2007-05-02T16:45:00.000-05:00

Today is a crappy day. Our trip has been delayed because we're having house issues. I'm frustrated and near tears. I drop in my chair with a heavy sigh and a Diet Dr. Pepper. And then....

I decide to see what Amy is up to.

Thank goodness for Amy and her yummy soap, but oh my... this made me laugh! In the midst of needing a new drainage field and not being able to buy a new house right now and nitpicky buyers... this made me laugh.

So, here it is... tacky and unrefined, but hilarious:

Random Thoughts

2007-05-01T07:55:00.000-05:00

I woke up this morning, looked up at the ceiling, and then my mind went into overdrive. I wasn't even out of bed, yet.

Chris is having a rough time managing two positions at work. He's going to bring a proposal to his boss this week that would solve his problems. It may, however, involve a great deal of time apart from us for a couple of months. I've never been away from him for more than a week or two. Blech. This doesn't make me feel good, and it puts a damper on our relocation plans. Even so, I know it has to be done, and Chris will profit immeasurably from the time he'll have to dedicate to his new job.

We're leaving in two days to go find a house. I'm so excited. I'm also scared and sickly nervous and anxious. I did meet a woman online yesterday that lives in Cookeville. She's a realtor, and I happened upon her page as I was looking at houses. She is a homeschooling mom, coaches youth leagues at the "Y", and heads up the robotics teams for the kids. There is a jr. league that Jordan and Cayden can join. How cool! That email exchange really made my day. It also cemented my choice to go ahead and homeschool next year.

Which brings me to my other thoughts. I had been considering letting Jordan and Cayden go to school next year. The district is apparently really good. I figured they could go to school next year, and then after Adrian goes, I could start at TTU. Well, I couldn't fathom myself home with just ONE kid, but I was willing to give it a try. Then, I talked to Tracy, and I got to thinking about the different opportunities the boys will have next year, by homeschooling. So, we're staying home again. Cayden is already learning so much. We're reading our first chapter book together, albeit a small one. He really enjoys it, though, and his listening and comprehension skills are improving daily.

I wrote that post about my Aunt and now this rambling mess. I'm considering starting a more anonymous blog. I'll keep Scatterbrained, but it'll be a little less...personal. The other spot could be my little hideaway. So, we'll see. If things get strangely impersonal here, you'll know why...

~Me

Mending Hearts

2007-04-28T22:37:00.000-05:00

I had dinner with my aunt tonight. I haven't seen her since "the storm." Yet, over the past year or so I've reflected so much on her life, and the ways it parallels mine. I've pondered my own judgements of her character and decisions she's made. Her life has become easier to understand, her path seeming wise, though rocky at times, as I've found myself in her steps.

Tonight, we joined hearts and hands. We talked, cried, laughed, and shared. She said something to me that mended my heart, and comforted my soul. Something I didn't realize I needed to hear. She said she was sorry. And that was really soothing to me. I just needed to know that, indeed, she understood why things went amok, and why I strayed so many years ago from a clear cut path of academic accomplishment and self-sufficiency. I needed to know that she understood why survival and self-preservation was the highest goal I could attain.

She understands me, and I understand how she turned and walked away from the chaos that continues to ensue even today, destroying lives and dashing hopes. I follow her.

She smiled, her eyes warm. Moments of my own reflection. Our bonds so strong so many years ago, resumed in an evening. Warm and tender expressions of love lost...regained.

Thank you, Aunt ~M~ for who you are, and for leaving me with an impression upon my life that always caused me to strive to be more... even when *more* wasn't always much.

Thank you for listening, and for saying "I'm sorry."

I'm proud of you, and who you are. Not just for your career (however incredibly amazing and stellar it is) but for being you, and choosing to walk away, because without you... there very literally would be noone else.

Dual offers = Dueling...

2007-04-26T09:45:00.000-05:00

And DUEL she did. The woman buying our house raised her offer in light of another that came in. So, we're selling our house for a higher price than we asked, sold in a matter of DAYS, and get to go to Cookeville next week! It'll be fun picking out a new house and actually having a little money to pick and choose with!

All that's holding us back right now is that home inspection, but we made her a pretty generous counter-offer in light of the fact that there ARE issues that will come up during the inspection. Our realtor feels really good about the situation and our buyer is really excited. She wants to close ASAP but um...we have to get another home first. :)

That Was Quick!

2007-04-24T06:11:00.000-05:00

Sometime this afternoon, our house will be under contract. We received a great offer last night, and we have another showing today! So long as the financing and home inspection goes smoothly, then the house will be SOLD and the profit generous!

The Promotion Pt. 2 and More

2007-04-23T20:15:00.000-05:00

So, Chris got a promotion a couple months ago. Since then, he's been in training. His "promotion" is official once we get things settled in Cookeville. Well, apparently, he's up for another promotion already. But, as before, details are sketchy.

It's interesting because we spent quite a bit of time praying about Chris' job, and even had friends that were in agreement with us that Chris would be blessed with the opportunity to use his potential. He's being recognized heartily and almost daily for his amazing capacity to learn and take initiative in everything he does.

I mentioned our house went on the market on Friday. We're waiting for the realtor to call. Apparently, we have an offer already. 3 showings today, and one scheduled for tomorrow.

I'm nervous. If the house sells this soon, I could be spending some time alone in Cookeville without Christopher. I want the house to sell! I just dread time away from my husband. We're the clingy type...

Stay REAL
~Me

MIL Clean!

2007-04-22T09:01:00.000-05:00

Apparently I'm in a state of confession. I confessed on my homeschooling board last night that "punk ass" is a term of endearment in our house and that my kids DO know cuss words from the non-cuss-words, and have been known to test the waters by interjecting "ass" into their vocabulary on occasion. Fortunately, it's the best homeschooling board in the world, and they felt no need to dissociate themselves from me.

My next confession is this: I hate cleaning house, and my house is generally !clean. That's "NOT clean" for all of you coding illiterate folks. :) Generally, there are 534 pieces of laundry to put away, at least 1/2 sink full of dishes, bathrooms with *gasp* icky toilet rings... you get my drift. My house is NEVER "mother-in-law ready" except the one time when my MIL came to our house 3 years ago. We cleaned that house for a MONTH to get it ready.

Now, having made that confession, allow me a brag! My house is MIL-Clean and it has been for 48 hours! That's right, folks. And to top it off, my MIL isn't even coming to see us!

Since we've readied the house and cleaned it up so well, I've decided I actually LIKE it this way. I think I'm going to keep it this way. Right now, it sorta has to stay like this for house showings (which we have 1 today at noon!), and it's great practice for the whole family. No longer does everyone step over the mess, but rather we seem to be actually migrating TOWARDS the mess, and taking part in it's destruction.

The boys are begging for homemade waffles with strawberries and fresh whipped cream.

Never said I can't COOK. :)

~Sunshyne

It's Official!

2007-04-20T11:42:00.000-05:00

Our house is "For Sale"!

We've been working on it for a couple months. Not a little here and there, mind you. We've been busting our arses getting this place ready. Our Realtor was absolutely amazed at the walkthrough yesterday. Chris and I make a heck of a team, and we're very proud of what we've accomplished. I hope we sell quickly. I'm ready to go to Cookeville and pick out a new house! I think we may do a bit of a fixer upper again, as we're turning this place over for a nice little profit.

One thing I've learned though: I'm going to start renovating as soon as we get moved in, as I love having such a fresh house! I love the new floors, new paint, and cleanliness of it all. We threw so much stuff away. How did we accumulate this much junk in a year?!? I think most of it was stuff the previous owners left behind here. Just...stuff. Old chairs, old paint, old appliances...old junk.

I'm exhausted. I need sleep, and a lazy day. For now, though, I wait with my phone nearby. We have to leave at a moments notice for showings. Let's hope that there won't be many showings, and the offers will be generous and plentiful!!! :)

Need a house?

~Sunshyne

Growing up under false pretenses...

2007-04-16T21:37:00.000-05:00

My wife and I have set up this blog together.

By my wife and I, I really mean my wife set up her blog, and forced me to be part of it by adding all of my information in it against my will. Much like my own personal myspace page, http://www.myspace.com/cmorack . It is very clever, and so popular that all the music from the artists I enjoy all gets deleted and forgotten with time, age, and cholesterol.

Speaking of getting fat though, I’m feeling rather well actually. And I’m not really all that fat at all. In fact, I’m feeling pretty good about myself right now. Except of course, for the core reason I’m writing this blog entry. That reason is that I am not an astronaut.

Since I was a child, I grew up wanting to be an astronaut. Like many children, I would wake up every morning on the frozen northern lands of the greater Central New York region, whilst looking through the overcast sky at what may have been stars through the early morning haze. I remember saying to myself on many of those cold days, “I hope I didn’t miss the bus,” while shivering a bit and glancing down 38A and waving to the my friends standing in the road a little ways up from me. “I sure hope they get hit by the bus today. That’d be cool,” were some of my next thoughts.

Needless to say, space was on my mind. I just KNEW that I would be an astronaut. I even figured out what people would call me. I’d be Chris Morack, Astronaut Extraordinaire. I would be so cool that not even the zero-g’s of space could contain my sheer amount of awesome. I just knew, at the ripe young age of around 16 or something, that I was going to be an astronaut.

Well, unfortunately, I can now safely say that I did not become an astronaut. In fact, I didn’t become a lot of things that I had hoped to become.

However, like all blogs, this one too will end with some sort of sappy, woman-friendly ending like a Disney movie, or perhaps like Rocky Balboa if I was able to stomach it any further than about the mid-way point. So you had better brace yourself. There is good news to this. It’s happy news. I became something special. Something not everybody could manage to pull off.

So I suppose in a way, I can still look back on things, smile a bit, and know that I had in fact done a pretty good job with things. I might not have been many of the things I was told I could be if I ‘put my mind to it’, by my teachers. My parents’ big goal for me was ‘I hope you move out some day’, and by god, I moved out!

Here’s to you, mom and dad!

At least one of us got our big wishes to come true!

Oh and by the way, I never dreamed of becoming a father and a husband when I was a child, but it's a great thing to be. Not only do I have the opportunity to tell my children they can be astronauts and firemen when they grow up, I can still reach for the stars and get a little higher by holding them on my shoulders.

Never give up on a dream.

American History X: Incredible Movie

2007-04-15T10:07:00.000-05:00

"We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battlefield and patriot grave to every living heart and hearthstone all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the Union, when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature."

Abraham Lincoln

Chris and I watched American History X last night. It came out in 1998, so I'm not sure why we haven't seen it before. I think we were both expecting a Spike Lee production, and that was probably the reason for the delay.

I think this may be one of the only movies I've ever seen that had me crying more than once. It was gut-wrenching, moving, and shameful all at once.

Issues of my childhood were laid bare, as there was a scene between the father and son that actually took place at my own dinner table more than once.

Racism. I've spent my latter teen years and adult life overcoming false convictions planted in my head as a young child. My family wasn't a bunch of skinheads. Rather...they were closet racists. The kind that begins the sentence with "I'm not racist but..." Time has softened my dad, but even recently my grandfather couldn't resist the "n" word.

I've always felt, and still do, that I shouldn't need to apologize for something my forefathers and ancestors did. Yet, American History X wasn't about slavery or affirmative action (which may have had it's place once, but turned out to be counterproductive). It was about hate. It was about anger. And in the end, it dealt with reconciliation of the heart.

I caution most of my readers NOT to get this movie. I guess there were about 2356 swear words, a horrendous prison scene, and plenty of other activity not for the faint of heart.

Still, this movie will stay with me for a very long time. It affirms my allegiance to my own family, and especially my children that I will never propagate a predisposition to racism, stereotyping, and judgment. My children will be raised to see beyond the surface, and to see with eyes of love and acceptance.

Oh...and Edward Norton was pretty easy on the eyes, too!

Friends...

2007-04-12T10:14:00.000-05:00

I'm overwhelmed with anxiety and excitement about our upcoming move. I'm also terrified. I'm leaving everything I know behind. Over the years that we've spent here, I've dealt with so much disappointment and failed expectations.

I haven't seen my mother in months. I have nothing to do with my brother or my biological father's family. I've had to face the fact that I'm just... *different* from them. That's been a hard truth to learn.

So, as we prepare to move to TN, I've been faced with the realization that, aside from my immediate family and a handful of long distance friends, I'm going to be alone. Completely alone. No friends. Noone to call up and say, "Let's go have coffee." I've been worried. Loneliness and I are a terrible combination, though we've met many times. This time I prayed. God please don't let me fall backwards into a dark hole. It's too hard to get out. I've been psyching myself up, promising my kids tons of friends in an effort to manipulate myself to go out and meet people when we get there.

God had a better idea. A really good plan.

I'll rewind. After the hurricane (yes THAT one), we lived in that dirt pit with other families from Oreck that needed a place to stay. One day, this little girl came to my steps are started reciting all the dinosaurs she knew. The list was long. She kept rattling off Latin genus/species combinations and creatures I'd never fathomed. Finally, after some contemplation, I had to ask, "Are you homeschooled?!?"
...and indeed she was. So, began a bit of correspondence between her mother and I. Our families met a few times during those trying months. We even baked Christmas cookies together. Of course, we lost touch as we moved on to bigger dwellings, better times.

A few weeks ago, we ran into the family at Petsmart. The news was grand! They're moving to Cookeville, too! Diane and I have since had coffee and shared all the stresses of the storm and moving and moving AGAIN and homeschooling and life and... let's just say it was great to have someone to talk to. We'll be getting the kids together next week, and we're making plans for Cookeville.

"Kindred spirits," she said.

Thanks God.

Jodi

2007-04-11T08:15:00.000-05:00

My coffee is perfect this morning. I woke up thinking of Jodi, and I'm sad that she's leaving in a couple of days.

Jodi came in my life through the fellowship we've been attending on Sundays. At first I was intimidated by her forward, open manner. As time passed, I saw in her a warm, genuine friend. We shared a few evenings at Starbucks and dinner. It has been Jodi that pulled me away from the daily grind to savor a few moments of relaxation and companionship that only a girlfriend can really provide. These days, those moments are so precious.

A while back I wrote a post about "hurting" and I couldn't imagine that anything but time would really make me feel better. Jodi did. She pulled me out of that slump of despair and loneliness. In these past weeks, she left her mark on my heart. I'm glad to have known Jodi and shared those great times. I hope that, even though our lives part, we'll still keep in touch.

I'm not great with words and I don't like goodbyes. So, I'll see ya later, Jodi. I love you, and I wish you the very best. I hope that you soon find yourself in the midst of everything you hope for, and everything you really do deserve to have. I think you're incredible, and I admire you in so many ways. Thank you for being my friend.

...pass the tissue, please.

Dr. Dad

2007-04-08T17:01:00.000-05:00

So, my dad came this weekend. I was so looking forward to having him, and the boys were as well. He painted Jordan and Cayden's room. Chris and I were both working on our own projects during that time. Yet, as the weekend wore on, I found it harder to talk, harder to think, harder to remain calm... I'm tired. I'm so mentally and physically exhausted that when my dad was about to leave...he turned to us.

"Rest. Ya'll need a day off. Spend some time together, and just forget about the house for a day." Dr. Dad...with the right prescription.

My eyes welled up with tears, because I WANT a day off. But, I compromised and took half the day off. Now I'm working on finishing the boys' bathroom. It's almost done. Just a couple more things, and it'll be perfect.

Soon it'll be over...soon.

Painting and Homeschooling

2007-03-29T14:07:00.000-05:00

How's that for a catchy title? Oh, not really. The only thing they have in common is that they are taking up all my time. I'm going to be a damn good painter when all is said and done! And my kid is still being edumacated, albeit not quite as steadfastly as he has been previously, but we're still plodding ahead.

The house is coming along. Kitchen is done, hallways are nearly done. I'm a few days behind schedule as I didn't plan to wake up Sunday without an iota of energy. It hurt to move, and so I didn't - except to reach for the remote and food.

We're seriously hoping to have this place on the market in about 12-14 days. And then we wait... and we clean. Did you know that I have to have a clean house 24/7 when it's on the market? Uh...anyone want 3 kids, 2 dogs, and a ferret? So, I'm hoping that everything happens fast... Put the house up, get an offer, go to Cookeville and pick out a new house... all in...2 weeks? Dandy. It's confession baby!

Oh, I've got to paint trim now. Good day to you all.

2007-03-20T18:12:00.000-05:00

My hands hurt. I've been scraping old linoleum off a concrete slab all day. For those of you who don't know, it's quite possibly one of the most frustrating renovation jobs ever. My knuckles have bled, my back is permanently stuck, my arms feel like long wet noodles. I hurt. And dammit, there's still old linoleum on that floor. Maybe tomorrow I'll win the war.

On the bright side: the kitchen is painted. I still have to do the door and trim. One hallway has new flooring. The other is in progress (see above). By the weekend, I hope to have the hallways finished, painted, and the kitchen trim done. This will be a big chunk of my "to do" list.

Next week I'll paint the living room, move the office and Adrian's bedroom, paint the office, and finish the bathrooms. My wonderful dad is planning to come and paint the boys rooms with them. A paint party, he called it. The boys are so excited.

The following week I'll get outside to mow and landscape.

Then the house should be ready... Hopefully we'll get it on the market the week after Easter. I can't wait. Cookeville is calling...

Oh, and Chris begins training this week for his super cool new job. He's going to be a lab technician in the Engineering department. His boss has hopes of him picking up some AutoCad stuff, too. Seeing as how 3-D inclined Christopher is, I think that's going to be fabulous. I'm so proud of my man. He's thrilled with the possibilities that have opened up for him, and well on his way to a great career.

Soccer winds down this week. The kids are disappointed. I'll miss it, too, though I'm looking forward to reclaiming my Saturdays. I've a post in the making about the things we've learned in Soccer this year, but that's for another time.

So, there's an update minus all the humor and fun. We're still pressing on...and busy as heck. Lowes is our new friend. Did I mention that Chris made FOUR trips to Lowes on Sunday? He's a real plumber in the making. He redid all the plumbing in the boys bathroom. I was impressed. Aren't you?

The Unexpected Guest

2007-03-12T07:12:00.000-05:00

The blinds were drawn, the TV loud, and the good times were plentiful as we introduced "Firefly" to a friend of ours yesterday.

A knock at the door jolted us all, and I wondered out loud if Jodi might be getting a chance to meet The Old Lady up close and personal.

But no! I peeked over the glass pane in the door, expecting to see the grimacing neighbor ready to rob my pantry once more, but instead...

It was a kindly, distinguished gentleman standing on the other side. My heart jumped with joy! An old friend. I opened the door, and Chris and Jodi came bounding off the couch. Why? Well, it was Mr. David, our dear Canadian friend. We were so thankful and blessed by his presence. He wasn't able to stay long, but plans were made. We will see him again, soon.

I can't say I've enjoyed those surprise knocks in a long time... Yesterday made it all the better.

The Promotion

2007-03-08T08:58:00.000-06:00

Christopher has been in the Printshop for about 3 years. He really likes it most of the time, but he feels like it doesn't have much room for upward mobility.

Yesterday, he got a promotion! We're excited.

What will he be doing, you ask?

We don't know.

How much will he be making, you wonder?

We don't know.

When does he move over to his new job, you inquire?

We aren't sure.

His boss says it's salaried (which means Chris will get to go to college and his company will pay for some of it). Pay will be finalized later...

It's a day job, which means Chris' schedule will no longer flip flop every two weeks. This allows us the opportunity to go back to school if we want.

It's in the Engineering department. Some tech. position. Chris has been pondering a career in Engineering for some time, and this seems to be a shove in that direction. He's going to design the world's coolest *cough* vacuum *cough* someday.

At any rate, I had a happy husband yesterday, and though information is sparse, I'm certain it just proves that my man is really amazing, both at work and home.

Congrats, Chris, for continuing to be so diligent and determined in all you do. You've made us so proud, and we love you!

The Old Lady

2007-03-02T19:55:00.000-06:00

Every parent dreads that moment. You know the one. It's the worse timing ever. You and your husband/wife behind locked doors. The passion is heating up. Crucial moments starting to peak, almost within reach.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK! MOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM!!! (said in the most whiney DESPERATE voice)

Ugh. It's them. THE KIDS that won't go away. The moment is gone, in an instant. Getting it back is about as likely as snow in Mississippi.

So, what does this have to do with an "Old lady" you ask?

Today, things got...interesting. The awfully timed knocks at the door were followed by "MOM, it's the OLD LADY." The scramble was on. Clothes and blankets flying everywhere. My husband opens the door half ready to strangle the....

OLD LADY?!? Not the front door to the house, mind you. She was at my BEDROOM DOOR. Oh my gaw. I thought Chris was going to die.

You see, there is this old lady next door. She's a bit....mentally challenged. She comes to the front door about twice a week (and only when we're you know... doing it) to ask for a soft drink and stamps. Why the hell she needs so many stamps I don't know. Maybe she's running a chain letter operation out of her house. It's not working out though, because she's having trouble affording soft drinks. So, I generally send her off with a 2 liter and stamp. Today, Chris just sorta uh...shoved her off.

She was at the BEDROOM door folks.

The kids let her in, and then screamed in warning as she approached the SACRED door.

"It's the old lady!!!" I would have died in embarrassment had the whole situation not been so...unusual.

And it didn't snow in Mississippi, so uh... yeah. Leave me alone, now.

P.S. The kids have since been repeatedly lectured about answering the front door. So, if you come to my house and I'm busy... don't expect my kids to open the door. If they do, please refrain my knocking on my bedroom door. Thank you.

Major overhaul forthcoming!

2007-03-02T12:04:00.000-06:00

To all my 4 readers!

You heard it right! There are major changes coming on Unconventionally Yours/Scatterbrained. I'm thinking of going 3 columns! That's right folks, THREE columns. And, I'm thinking I might actually implement some colorful background too. So, get ready for the up and coming new look.

...just don't get too impatient, it could take awhile. :)

I feel the excitement already...

Laundry Can Be Painless?!?

2007-02-28T19:48:00.000-06:00

Mark Driscoll is da man!

Well, maybe not, but at least my laudry is getting done. I uploaded a few of Mark's podcasts to my crappy Ipod Shuffle today. With something to keep me busy, I was victorious over the mountains of laundry piling up in my hallway, and my husband finally has clean underwear again.

Thanks, Mark!

Liberty

2007-02-27T09:53:00.000-06:00

In my Bible, in the introduction to Galatians, it says:

...But liberty is not a license. Freedom in Christ means freedom to produce the fruits of righteousness through a Spirit-led lifestyle.

The resonates with me. I've experienced so much in the past several months. A freedom to think, feel, and learn without the confines of preset theology. Yet, sometimes that freedom can lead one amok, and it some ways I did flail my way through, often times staggering off the path. Even still, His voice is so pure and clear. A gentle reminder to stay the course, the right course.

I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and th elife which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Galatians 2:20

Theology

2007-02-24T20:06:00.000-06:00

Theology drives me nuts.

There. I said it.

I find that the more I try to understand, the less I care. It really is about faith.

For me, I think the Apostle's creed pretty much sums it up:

I believe in God, the Father almighty,

creator of heaven and earth.

I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord.

He was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit

and born of the Virgin Mary.

He suffered under Pontius Pilate,

was crucified, died, and was buried.

He descended into hell.

On the third day he rose again.

He ascended into heaven

and is seated at the right hand of the Father.

He will come again to judge the living and the dead.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,

the holy catholic Church,

the communion of saints,

the forgiveness of sins,

the resurrection of the body,

and the life everlasting.

Amen.

...having said all that, I still can't resist checking out iMonk at least twice a week. I don't always agree, but it makes me think... and thinking is good. I think.

Day 3: Wow.

2007-02-23T11:26:00.000-06:00

Day 3

How easy it has been to fall back into His arms. I had neglected my time with my Lord, lately. I have been selfish and foolish with my time.

This morning, I opened my Bible and the presence of the Holy Spirit was immediate. This is amazing to me, because I have always felt overwhelmed and intimidated by the Book. Looking for hidden meaning, trying to find WHAT I'm supposed to read, wondering just how relevant it is. I have come to associate the Bible with confusion and frustration. I haven't ever been one to spend much time reading it because it always left me feeling unsatisfied. So, for the past 3 days, I've cast off those thoughts and just picked it up and read it. I didn't look for anything specific. I started a little in Acts on Wednesday and Thursday, but today Romans caught my eye. In that moment, when the Holy Spirit joined me, I knew all was right. I began to read with peace. And I so love what I read:

Romans 12:

9 Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good.
10 Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another;
11 not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord;
12 rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer;
13 distributing to the needs of the saints, given to hospitality.
14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.
16 Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
17 Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men.
18 If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.
19 Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,”^[a] says the Lord. 20 Therefore

“ If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
If he is thirsty, give him a drink;
For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.”^[b]

21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

What a standard! Love with brotherly affection, fervent in spirit, steadfast in prayer, giving to those who are in need, blessing those who persecute us, empathetic towards our brethren....

Do not be wise in our own opinion (isn't this hard, sometimes?), and always having regard for good things for all men, living peaceably as much as is possible.

As I read these things, I especially think of the fellowship that I attend on Sundays. It's a wonderful time, but I found it to be emotionally taxing lately. I think maybe it's because I was looking for some sort of gratification, and walking away feeling little of it. Yet, if I look back, with these scriptures in mind, I see things that I hadn't seen before. I see Christ in a different way. I think my focus has become too inward. Not purposely, of course. Still, I believe that it is time for my focus to move outward.

As I write this, things become clear, and even something I read last night sticks in my mind. I'm going to ramble now, and it's my blog so I can do that. I don't expect you to read this. I need to write, though.

About a year ago (just a little more, really) I had a spiritual turning point. Yet, I never felt ready to go out and grab people and start ministering to them. I did this lots when I was younger, but for some reason, I've felt like I was on "mute" or something. Aside from my dad, I've not really shared much about my "new faith" with people. I mostly have just been learning, praying, meditating on Christ. It's been amazingly fulfilling, really. About 2 months ago, though, I started feeling this ... URGENCY. Mostly, it was geared toward my parents, but also I wanted to reach some really hurt people. I even got this odd assortment of a person that I wondered if our fellowship could take on. I wondered if we were really ready for HURTING people. Oh, he showed up. And then, others followed, and I somehow just sorta lost my footing. Everything has been quiet and icky for awhile. I wasn't sure what to do with these people. They needed something, but I've been on "mute", so I just stayed quiet (occasionally sticking my foot in my mouth) and lacking somehow.

All year, I've known that I had to be restored and that Christ was doing something with me. Just up to the last couple months. I've been floundering the past couple of months, strugglng to keep my head up for some reason.

Last night, I read a blog entry written by someone who just recently came to Christ. He's been wanting to kinda JUMP into ministry because he has this really cool testimony, but he keeps hearing that he ought to wait about 3 years. Those three years spent with Christ, understanding his faith and purpose. 3 years...muted, waiting, learning.

So, it hasn't been 3 years, and I'm not really running to be in the ministry. But I've been an on/off/on/off sort of believer all my life. I was just never able to put my thoughts and beliefs in any certain "box," and this was always very frustrating for me. Yet, this past year, I've been put in a place of waiting and learning. I've been the "needy" one, and He's been providing for me, strengthening me.

Can I say that I'm excited? As I'm writing, I'm realizing that maybe my release has come! Perhaps, I can move forward, now. I don't mean I'm ready to jump off a cliff, but maybe I'm off "mute." Maybe, I really can share with that Aunt I've been thinking of for a long time. I really can use discernment and move beyond my own 4 walls, ready for the warfare and the work of God, praying and reaching out to the hurting.

I believe that Jesus Christ is the son of God, and that he has come to save us from the dark depths of our own fleshly making.

I believe that there are people, though they've heard about Christianity and religion, waiting to hear about Jesus. Just Jesus.

I believe that there are people who need hope in this world, and that HOPE comes from the sacrifice of the Lamb. Our precious Jesus.

Oh my, how humble I feel, and how excited I am...all at once.

Thank you, Lord, for showing me this and opening up the world to me. With You by my side, who can be against me? Lead me, oh Lord, and show me Your ways....

Prayer of Boldness

2007-02-21T14:24:00.000-06:00

The Saints prayed this prayer after Peter and John went before the Sanhedrin.

24 So when they heard that, they raised their voice to God with one accord and said: “Lord, You are God, who made heaven and earth and the sea, and all that is in them, 25 who by the mouth of Your servant David[b] have said:

‘ Why did the nations rage,
And the people plot vain things?
26 The kings of the earth took their stand,
And the rulers were gathered together
Against the LORD and against His Christ.’[c]

27 “For truly against Your holy Servant Jesus, whom You anointed, both Herod and Pontius Pilate, with the Gentiles and the people of Israel, were gathered together 28 to do whatever Your hand and Your purpose determined before to be done. 29 Now, Lord, look on their threats, and grant to Your servants that with all boldness they may speak Your word, 30 by stretching out Your hand to heal, and that signs and wonders may be done through the name of Your holy Servant Jesus.”
31 And when they had prayed, the place where they were assembled together was shaken; and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, and they spoke the word of God with boldness.

Under persecution, these people went straight to the Almighty for covering. Together, as one, they cried out. The Holy Spirit went among them, and granted the desire of their hearts. Their desires were for the good of the Kingdom of God.

Lent?

2007-02-20T23:16:00.000-06:00

I know today is Mardi Gras, and I know tomorrow is the first day of Lent. I don't know the how's and why's and who's, but I don't think it matters too much for now. I know that people give something up for lent, like a fast. I think that's a good thing. I decided this year that this would be a good time to get some balance in my life, too.

So, for the next 40 days? or so, I'm going to abstain from visiting all those internet forums that drain my time away. Instead of getting up in the morning and reading the forums while I sip my coffee, I'm going to read my Bible. I'm going to spend time reading the Bible to the boys, too. I may even use some of that time to paint my house. There's lots of time to be utilized, really. I've a feeling I'll have read the whole Bible back and front, painted my house AND my neighbor's house just in the time I normally spend online.

"Hi, my name is Sunshyne and I'm an internet-add..."

Ummm... you get my drift?

So, that's it. Bye-bye WTM, FF, Sonlight, and that alien-abduction place... See ya in 40 days.

I fully intend to continue blogging. Therefore, my 4 regular readers (ok, maybe not that many) will still be able to keep up with my incredibly adventurous life.

Oh my GOSH, there's a UFO in my backyard!!!

...just kidding...

It Hurts

2007-02-19T16:08:00.001-06:00

Just hold me a little tighter today, Lord. It hurts. I'm sad, and nothing is gonna help this time. Not even Pioneer Woman's Chocolate Cake.

Maybe it'll fade away in a few days, but yesterday and today it hurts.

I feel like a needy little kid, without a mommy.

Oh wait, I *am* a needy-little (I can dream)-kid without a mommy.

That doesn't help any...

...this too shall pass....

Tennessee Again

2007-02-15T15:44:00.000-06:00

As I said previously, there was something liberating about being at Burgess Falls. Perhaps it was because I had waited for so long to escape. The whole time we were walking the trails, I was longing to be below in the valley. I wanted to be encompassed by my surroundings. Then, I wanted to be at the top, at the cliff's edge. As the hike continued, I eventually found myself in both of these places. Standing at the edge of the highest waterfall was so awesome. I was terrified and excited as I knelt down at the edge to get this picture of the water crashing down on the rocks below. This particular waterfall is 130 feet high. Wow.

The boys couldn't have been happier than they were on that day. No mention of TV and video games or even FOOD as we traversed the mountain trails. They were brave, edging along the cliffs carefully and steadily. At times, I was a bit nervous, but they made me proud.

The water was gorgeous, and I loved the steady sounds of the falls. Still, it was the rocks, the terrain that was most breathtaking. Even in the barren winter, there was so much beauty to behold.
For the past couple of months, I've felt like I've been at a standstill with God. During my trip, He was so evident in so many details. The beauty I saw - a gift from Heavenly Father. I saw him in the oddest details -moments of revelation and understanding. Thank you, Lord, that even these things matter to you.

I love knowing that such an adventure lies ahead, and that HE will be by our side.

Tennesse Bound

2007-02-14T15:45:00.000-06:00

"PLEASE take me away from here. Let's just pack and go to Tennesee," went my repetitive pleas to Chris shortly after the hurricane a year and a half ago. We never did make that trip. I so wanted to run away. To escape to a place where hurricanes didn't matter, lost friends were forgotten, and memories would (even for an instant) fade away. Chris couldn't get away from work, though. My very devoted and responsible husband wouldn't dream of abandoning his obligations, no matter.

Fast forward. Irony. His company sent us to Tennessee this weekend. An expense paid trip to the mountains. Not just ANY mountains, mind you. This is the place that is to be our future home. We are moving to Cookeville, TN sometime this year, and I couldn't be more excited. It's not every day that someone else pays for me to move to the mountains, afterall.

Our first impression of Cookeville was, as my husband would say, meh. Then, we were whisked away in Ms. Jane's ~~Lexus~~ Magical Carriage. What a tour! She showed us the sights, wowed us with statistics and scenery, and made sure we were overcome with anticipation. Thanks, Jane! So, let me tell you...

This little town is HAPPENING. Universities, arts, nature, cuisine, clubs, activities. It's amazing what this incredibly southern little town has to offer. Oh, and the sweet tea is DIVINE. I drank delicious tea all weekend. I just THOUGHT people in Mississippi could make a good glass of sweet tea.

For me, however, nature sells. When the weather is right, and the scenery set... I love to be outdoors. The crisp air blowing in my hair and the sound of a distant creek trickling down the mountain rocks is, to me, the perfect place.

We found a little slice of paradise and had a wonderful family adventure. Pure Morack bliss.

I got teary eyed as we stood at the edge of this cliff overlooking a 130 foot waterfall. It was so amazing to stand so close to the edge, so free, so dangerous. The adrenaline rush was incredible.

Chris even took the kids, one by one, to the cliff's edge.

We had such an incredible time. The boys loved it. Any fears they had of moving were completely alleviated, and now we just count the days...

Ladies! Single? Need a date? Check THIS out!

2007-02-14T12:55:00.000-06:00

A Valentine's Advertisement straight from ChoiceCentral.

Vanity and Bankruptcy

2007-02-08T22:56:00.000-06:00

So, we're going out of town this weekend. I wanted to at least TRY to look good, ya know? So, I call the salon. My girl is out of town this week. Of course. Just get someone good to cut my hair, please.

So, I was all prepared to show my new 'do, but it sorta blends with my jacket hanging on my chair. S'okay. I'm still feeling vain. And for 70 bucks, I oughta be. The new guy apparently cost quite a bit more!

I sucked it up and headed next door for a Chai Latte. Delightful.

Family....

2007-02-08T22:48:00.000-06:00

They bicker and disagree. They love and cherish. They laugh and cry.

My Jesus-Family, at our Sunday "Jesus Place", celebrating and duplicating what Jesus did. Eating together, loving one another, hearts joined...with ultimate purpose.

Unity and Love.

Corgi Snuggles

2007-02-01T21:46:00.000-06:00

Cozy, eh? It was cuter before they decided to pose.

Later that same day...

Adrian and Cosmo decided to set up camp right in the kitchen...

I'm not feeling inclined to count...

2007-01-30T20:26:00.000-06:00

Since everyone else is doing it...

~~ONE~~ HOMESCHOOL BOOK YOU HAVE ENJOYED:
Definitely The Well-Trained Mind.
When I read it, it clicked. Really clicked. Jordan loves the resources we've pulled from this book, and so do I.

~~ONE~~ RESOURCE YOU WOULDN'T BE WITHOUT:
The Internet.

Next choice: Sonlight Catalog. Excellent reading lists.

~~ONE~~ RESOURCE YOU WISH YOU HAD NEVER BOUGHT:
This is hard. I'm very careful when I make purchases, and it takes me forever to make up my mind. I am seeing the "fruits of my mental labor" as I use pretty much EVERYTHING I buy. I bought a 10 dollar "First Encyclopedia of Science" for the incorporated science in our MFW program. I won't use it. We're going with Zoology 1 instead.

~~ONE~~ RESOURCE YOU ENJOYED LAST YEAR:
Last year? We didn't do much last year thanks to the Hurricane. I hardly remember last year...

We dabbled with Story of the World 2 activity guide. I was thankful for the reading lists. I should put that right up there with the Sonlight catalog.

Oh, does that library sale count? Gosh, I actually bought the bulk of the books we'll need for the next 10 years for less than 100 bucks.

~~ONE~~ RESOURCE YOU'LL BE USING NEXT YEAR:
Next year?!? We'll be using:
Latin Christiana 1
Spelling Power
Singapore Math
Drawing With Children
My Father's World Kindergarten/1st grade
Science and History to be determined...

How's that for ONE resource?

~~ONE~~ RESOURCE YOU'D LIKE TO BUY:
A really incredible telescope. Oh, and I'm drooling over Tapesty of Grace's redesign. Did I mention Classical Writing Aesop? We may use that next year.

I should just take out the word "ONE" from all these questions. Too restricting.

ONE RESOURCE YOU WISH EXISTED:
Gosh, I dunno. The Sunshyne Curriculum? Everything laid out, all my choices, perfectly flexible lesson plans... and all I have to do is take a hot bath... nice.

~~ONE~~ HOMESCHOOL CATALOG YOU ENJOY READING:
CBD, even though it is not be entirely homeschool related.
Home Science Tools has a good one, too.
I find Rainbow Resource's catalog daunting, but I order from them at least yearly.

ONE WEBSITE YOU USE REGULARLY:
I visit the Well-Trained Mind Curriculum board daily. Keeps me current with new curriculum choices. Keeps Christopher broke, too.

A Shout Out...

2007-01-26T21:22:00.000-06:00

After the storm, a fantastic woman came to my rescue to keep me on my feet with homeschooling. She was an angel, really.

I got to reading her blog. I'm addicted. I even told Angi about her yesterday.

Today, I find out she's in the running for a "Bloggie" award. How cool.

Check out Ree's blog...
Confessions of a Pioneer Woman

Once you realize that she is indeed hip, cool, and all things fun... go vote for her.

You'll have to scroll down to "Best Kept Secret Weblog"

If I Were an M&M....

2007-01-23T22:53:00.000-06:00

I don't know why I'd wear green gloves and boots, but I think I would.

I would have a penguin with me wherever I went, and a butterfly too.

A UFO would most certainly be my preferred method of transportation.

I'm starting to like this idea....

Now you want to be an m&m too, dontcha?

Patience...

2007-01-22T22:19:00.000-06:00

I've got coffee, although I must say that my cup is low.

And speaking of "low", I'm feeling a little that way.

I don't think the Book has all the answers, though I think it's a good start. Sure wish He'd pull up a chair and partake of my Hazelnut Coffee, while I ask tons of questions. We'd laugh, and he'd dismiss some of my childlike thoughts with a wave of his hand, no doubt.

Then, we'd get deep. And I could learn. Learn easy. Follow.

For now...I pray, and wait, and hope...and dream.

If I could get it all from my heart to my hands... I think I'd be okay.

Congratulations To ME!

2007-01-14T19:11:00.000-06:00

Today made 1 year since I quit smoking.

Can I say that again? One YEAR since I quit. I haven't SORTA quit, either. I QUIT. I haven't screwed up or relapsed. I've not put a cigarette between my fingers or to my lips in a YEAR. I am ecstatic. I did the math. I saved my lungs from 5475 cigarettes and my pocketbook 900 dollars!

Okay, so I can't take the credit for any of this.

A few years ago I worked with this girl at a daycare. I came in from my break, a familiar smoke trail following behind me. She remarked she'd quit smoking a year or two prior.
"How'd you quit?" I asked.

So her story began. She went to a Joyce Myers thing. Ms. Myers apparently did an altar call and my friend went up and threw her smokes on the altar. She begged God to help her out, and he did. I stored that little story somewhere in my scattered brain.

Fast-forward to last year. I was going to a church retreat. I knew I couldn't smoke for 3 days so I bought the biggest pack of nicotine gum I could find and smoked a half pack of Marlboros on the way to the church. I was living in that 200 sq. foot RV with my family of 5 and our dog at the time (thanks, Katrina). Quitting my nicotine was not on the agenda. Not mine anyway. Besides, I had long decided that it would someday be "my miracle" when I quit. God was going to do it. Just not on this particular weekend. It wasn't a good time, not one bit.

I suppose God had his own agenda. Someone prayed for me, and I knew the instance she began to address the bondage in my life that my nicotine habit was a thing of the past. I walked away that night knowing I'd never smoke again, and thanking God for *my miracle*.

In the past year I had ONE craving that amounted to anything memorable. It passed quickly and painlessly. I have LOVED telling people how I quit. What a good story, ya know?

So, thank you God. Thank you for setting me free. Thank you for caring about even that. Amazing.

Who Loves Ya Baby?

2007-01-13T10:10:00.000-06:00

Apparently the dogs have taken quite a liking to Papa C. We're pet-sitting the Schnauzer for a friend, and he's blending in well. The trio spent much of the evening vying for our attention. It was quite amusing.

Now, to teach the Schnauzer, Dell, how to catch tossed popcorn... hmm...

Flour Power

2007-01-11T11:05:00.000-06:00

Jessica posted a picture of her son's Sunday morning activities. I was reminded of this picture I had of Adrian.

It still makes me laugh. I left him there playing while I found my camera. A treasure!

Lip Gloss, Never Leave Home Without It

2007-01-03T22:10:00.000-06:00

Monday Morning. New Year's Day. Phone rings.

"Hey Sunshyne. It's Jody and Angi. We're about to have breakfast in -5 minutes (yes, that's MINUS 5 minutes), and you're invited!"

So, I groggily throw my clothes on, issue orders to the clan, and run out the door leaving a house full of starving monkeys in my wake.

Note that I did not put make-up on. On the way to the restaurant, I fumble around in my purse with one hand in search of anything that might disguise me or at least attempt to redeem my pale, tired complexion. Lip gloss! Mary Kay (disclaimer: I do not sell MK) lip gloss! I smear it all over as I'm ~~speeding~~ driving down the interstate.

Fast forward about 30 minutes.

My dear friend, Angi, has decided that her camera has a rightful place at our breakfast table! I'm inclined to disagree since it neither made nor refilled my coffee. However, it has apparently made me famous! I'm on the internet, folks, and I didn't do it myself!

Check out the forecast at Angi's Place. (I'm the plain faced one on the right)

Don't forget to grab some MK lip gloss from her shopping link, too. Never know when you might need it!

Delayed Reflections

2007-01-02T22:51:00.000-06:00

Yeah, the New Year is already in full swing, and I'm just now dragging my procrastinating self over here to do some talking.

Well, let me just say it WASN'T because I was off reading that new book I told you about. Sad to say, it's not pulling me in like BLJ did.

Anyway, I wanted to reflect.

2006 was the year that the Morack household became DIAPER FREE! Yes, folks, you heard it right. NO MORE POOPIES! Adrian now wears ~~Depends~~ Pull-ups at night, but that is all. No more landfill hogging!

2006 was the year that our techie/geeky family ventured beyond our screens of entertainment and into the world of SPORTS. God help us all.

Oh, speaking of sports, let me throw in a ~~joke~~ resolution here. I, Sunshyne M., fully intend to start Couch25K and actually COMPLETE it sometime during 2007. How cool would it be to be able to actually run further than the mailbox without falling over in the middle of the driveway?

I read very few books during 2006, because I'd rather read forums and magazines. Ain't that intelligent? Listen carefully and you shall hear a collective gasp from my TWTM friends.

I did, however, watch more movies than I could possibly count...

If you had a TV like ours, you'd probably have done the same...

Some of my favorites:

Thank You For Smoking So smart, so funny, so twisted!
Running Scared - Not for the faint of heart or conservative movie viewers, but we loved it.
Tristan and Isolde Dreamy...
Two for the Money Pacino makes me laugh, again!
Domino After I finish prancing in Isolde's dress, can I can kick some arse Domino-style? I wanna be Domino when I grow up.

And...while it was old news to everyone else on the planet... I finally discovered the coolest show that ever came on TV. ~Firefly~

2006 is the year we decided our house should most definitely smell like ferrets and not one, but TWO dogs. Mixed in with some clearance-priced air freshner, it's sure to keep some cell-groups away. Housechurching rebels welcomed, at your own risk!

In 2006 we found the coolest Jesus Place. Great people, lots of love, laughs, and friendship. Jesus is always there. I'm not talking about some Mexican guy, either. Although Mexicans are welcome, too.

2006 was the year we met Sump. Sump ate my phone. Sump stinks, and today I killed old Sumpy and got a new one. Sump is a pump. A really yucky one. See previous post if you're so inclined.

2006 is the year we saw a monkey pee from way up in a tree. The kids found this terribly funny. Please don't call them dorks. They will tell you what a dork is, and you probably don't want to know.

2006 is the year that Jordan learned to read. This is a great accomplishment, but I suddenly realized there are many things I wish he couldn't read, like trashy tshirts and gaming magazines.

2006 is the year Cayden started Kindergarten, and dreamed of kissing pretty girls. They move fast these days don't they? He's driving, too! (four-wheeler)

2006 is the year my hair really started turning gray. This doesn't have a darn thing to do with turning 30, either.

2006 was a year of renewal and rebuilding for our family. Christopher and I have renewed our relationship with one another and with Jesus. We've been building stronger bonds with our children, as well as rebuilding our lives after the hurricane of '05. Somewhere along the way, my husband really did become my absolute best friend. There's nothing he doesn't know and so very little he doesn't understand about me. I'm just in awe that our love continues to transcend expectation and imagination. Amazing that my heart still leaps and the butterflies still dance at his touch. I am so thankful for such a captivating soul to have joined my own

Oh, and we didn't get killed by falling rocks, either. Ain't life grand?

My Husband Bought Me Something...

2006-12-22T08:46:00.000-06:00

A book I've really really been wanting ever since I finished "Blue Like Jazz."

I started it last night. I think I'm going to enjoy it. I teared up once already, and laughed countless times.

God is so good.

I'll keep you updated on my progress.

2006-12-20T17:23:00.000-06:00

We've been baking lots for the past couple of weeks. This is our 3rd batch of sugar cookies, and we had lots of fun decorating them with icing. The boys are loving the different things we've been doing for the holiday season.

We didn't have a tree this year. I intended to decorate the living room with lights and garland and things. Unfortunately, one garland got half decorated. The other just has a 3 inch popcorn string hanging from it. It never got finished either. I'm thinking I should just UNDECORATE and leave it be.

Besides, who wants to hang Christmas lights when we could be baking cookies?!?!

More Soccer Bragging...

2006-12-15T18:14:00.000-06:00

Cayden was a star! He really did show amazing athletic ability, and others even commented on his skill.

Chris coached both of Cayden's games on Saturday. They won the first, lost the second.

I was unable to attend the first game, since I was coaching Jordan's team, but I loved being at the second one. It was nice not being the teacher, nor the coach.

I was just a mom. Sometimes, being a mom is the best thing to be!

Brownie Points from the Grandparents :)

2006-12-15T18:11:00.000-06:00

Jordan had his first soccer game on Saturday. He was an aggressive player, which really surprised me. They lost, but played hard.

Isn't he a handsome fella?

Go Moracks!

2006-12-08T23:10:00.000-06:00

I remember when I was a kid. There were some really important days in my childhood, like first day of the new school year. Those days you laid everything out and had everything ready for the next morning. You didn't sleep much, even though it was one of those days you probably needed the most rest.

My boys are homeschooled. There haven't really been any "First Day of School" type days. So, we were a bundle of excitement tonight as the kids readied their uniforms and tried out their new shoes. An extra shirt was tossed to Adrian who wanted to be part of the spectacle. You see, tomorrow is the first day of soccer for the Morack boys. Everything is ready to go for Game Day, and my living room looks like a mini-Academy.

You can't see the other gazillion balls and cones and bags and uniforms that I've strategically hidden from my camera's eye. Somehow, as I was dreaming of my sons becoming the next Beckham... I ended up being their coach.

Guess we'll all be learning soccer together!

Here's to the Morack boys, Coach Mom, and one GREAT year.

Player pics forthcoming...

See, Daddy, This is How You Do It...

2006-12-01T19:48:00.000-06:00

Adrian loves tools. He loves trucks and cars and all things Bob the Builder.

For Chris, it's one of those fine moments where fatherhood is cherished to the fullest...

I've Had My Nose in a Great Book

2006-11-08T15:09:00.000-06:00

It makes me laugh. Chris said I was smiling a silly smile, even. I just seem to identify with everything this guy is saying. It's truth that I didn't go looking for, either. It just sort of hit me between the eyes a few months ago, and now I feel like it's being refined. I nod alot while I'm reading this book. I think you should read it, too. Well, at least to page 70. I don't know what happens after page 70, but I'm sure it's going to be good.

You want to know the name of it, right?

Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller

A Vision Revised...

2006-11-04T17:13:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago, I made a comment at my Jesus-place, which was actually met with acute correction by a friend of mine.

I said, "We aim to win souls, right?"

"No...we're here to plant seeds," came her quick reply.

This exchange has played in my mind much lately. For me, it was comforting to redefine those terms, but a much bigger responsibility. Suddenly, every interaction I have with the world is an opportunity to plant, water, or harvest. I'm no longer thinking about the big "win souls" but rather the intricacies of getting a soul "won."

That hasty exchange in Wal-Mart as I shove my money in my purse and mumble a thank you (really meaning THANK GOD I'M DONE) to my cashier has transformed. I now take the time to ask them about their day as they do my check out, and LISTEN to their response. Many a time I have responded with assurance that I will pray for them or their family. Many times, wounded souls have cried out, finally released from a cold heart. Seeds planted, watered... hearts warmed.

That's what Jesus is about. It's in the details. Details I always overlooked. I saw a familiar face in Wal-Mart the other day. (I'm at Wal-Mart way too much. Have I mentioned that I don't even LIKE Wal-Mart?!?) Anyway, I normally would have smiled, said hi, and kept walking. That would have sufficed just fine, but no. I stopped. I sought her out, said hi, asked how she was... and then, I LISTENED. She talked and talked...and talked. And I continued to listen. It was obvious that she was relieved to just discuss her life. She apologized for her divorce, cause "good Christians" don't get divorced. I simply attempted to just love her. I'm not exactly gifted in LOVING people, but I've been asking for Jesus to show me how to just love someone. No strings, limitations, expectations. Kinda like he loves us. So, we had a great encounter. Seed watered. I think I'll see her again at bible study. I hope so.

I'm not a social butterfly. I don't normally seek people out. As time has passed, I've become more introvert. Yet, I've started to see people as people with SOULS and HEARTS and NEEDS. It's a wonderfully terrifying experience. Yet, the more I see, the more I love my Jesus, because now I recognize him in the details.

The Whole Healing Thang...

2006-10-30T22:34:00.000-06:00

Yesterday, I reached yet another milestone in my Jesus-journey. We were at our “Jesus-Place” and one of the guys came to me in the kitchen. It was getting time to close up in prayer. I had, more or less, just sorta existed through the morning. My mind was at rest, and I just sat passively about, savoring the praise reports offered by my friends.

Back to closing prayer: So, Gil comes up and says, “You know, you never seem to have any prayer needs, and I just want you to know that we'd like to pray for you if we can...”

I was moved by his sincerity, but a strange reply came forth. “Well, yes. I seem to have re-injured my back, but you know, I don't want pray for that whole HEALING THANG.”

Gaw. Wasn't that...nice?

Another guy looks at me like I suddenly stepped outta Hades, “HEALING THANG?!?”

Uh, yeah. You know, Jesus heals everybody, except the ones he doesn't?

So, there I was... a big foot in my mouth, and feeling a little vulnerable and exposed. Rather than backtrack, I continued on, as earnestly as I could. I know we can be healed, but I also know that not everyone is healed, and I really am tired of that “well, it's your fault” line. Some people say, “oh, you didn't have enough faith to be healed” or “you don't pay tithes, so you can't be blessed” or “He'll heal you, sister. PRAY!” I think he heals sometimes and I don't have the answers. I just know that it was strange for Gil to bring up prayer requests specifically to me whilst I was having this “not-requested request” in the back of my mind.

The awkward moment finally passes, and we go into prayer.

The Holy Spirit descended upon me, my breath warmed and quickened, a touch of familiar heaviness upon my shoulders, the unmistaken presence of my God, my Lord, my Jesus...

He took me back 15 years, as I (a teenager then) prayed over my injured father – a prayer for healing in his back. I was reminded of the moment my dad rose to his feet, healed... restored. I doubted it for many many years, but then just a year or so ago – dad told this story to my sister-in-law. He never forgot. The Lord's touch was so very REAL.

The Lord reminded me of the events of my initial back injury almost two years ago. I remembered those miraculous moments that I would enter his presence and be set free from pain. I remembered my Catholic cousin, witnessing the power of the Holy Spirit, seeing Jesus in a new way.

He reminded me of “my miracle.” The supernatural deliverance from cigarettes back in January. Something I always wanted, and He gave it to me, and I have given Him all the glory.

Then, my Father, my Lord, my Jesus, allowed his heavenly touch to flow from my shoulders, down into my back.

“Do not doubt. Be healed, my child. Here is your faith and restoration.”

Humbled, I stand, to proclaim, that YES, He is LORD. HE is sovereign, yet merciful. He is my Jesus, my Comforter, my Healer, my Savior...

Is He yours? Do you know Him? Shall I introduce you?

**I started this post yesterday, but didn't finish until now. It stands, that I have been completely free of lower back pain, since the moment I walked away from that prayer. I rose from my bed this morning without hesitation or soreness. It has been a blessing to move freely. Thank you, Jesus! I was so unworthy to receive, but it is by his Love and Grace that I was healed. Wow.